IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Junk/Street Food is the most affordable meal for the working class. But health problems due to rampant and uncontrolled consumption are being compounded. It has therefore become imperative for governments to impose a higher tax on them. To what extent do you agree to this arrangement by the government? Give your opinion.

Nowadays, trash
foods
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 which are much
more cheap
Replace the words
cheaper
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compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to high nutrition
foods
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 are popular among the people who earn lower incomes. Because of
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
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affects
Correct your spelling
effects
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 of processed
foods
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 on
human
Add an article
the human
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 body, authorities decided to make regulations on
Linking Words
this kind
Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
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 of
foods
Use synonyms
 and
increased
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
 the taxes on them. In my perspective
about
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
Linking Words
 issue, getting more taxes
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
 unhealthy market products won`t make any impact on people`s decision to buy
those kind
Change the determiner
that kind
those kinds
show examples
 of
foods
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. It would be more ethical and meaningful if the governments
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
 a new law to lessen the prices of healthy
foods
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such
Linking Words
 as meat, fruits and vegetables. In
this
Linking Words
way
Add a comma
way,
show examples
 people may have
option
Change the article
the option
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 to choose buying nutritional
foods
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 rather than trash ones. Even though
this
Linking Words
 solution may
costs
Verb problem
cause
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economical
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economic
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 problems for many
improving
Verb problem
apply
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countries,
this
Linking Words
 looks like the better option if we are talking about protecting public health from the
damages
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damage
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 industrial
foods
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 cause. In conclusion, imposing higher taxes on unhealthy food products wouldn`t solve the main problem. Producing quality
foods
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 and selling them
with
Change preposition
at
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 affordable prices will definitely help to get out of
this
Linking Words
 loop that people
were
Wrong verb form
have been
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 going through years by
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
.

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas more effectively by using clear topic sentences.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using a wider variety of words and phrases.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve accuracy.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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