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Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010

The charts below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010
#expenditure #two #countries #consumer #goods
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The chart below illustrates the cost of consuming goods in France and the
UK
Use synonyms
 in 2010. The figures are shown in
pounds
Use synonyms
 sterling.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is obvious that cars were the most popular among all the given consumptions
while
Linking Words
 the
less
Correct quantifier usage
most
show examples
 consumer thing was perfume during the mentioned year in both countries. When it comes to vehicles
UK
Use synonyms
 reached its peak at 450,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 sterling and the indicator was less just by 50
pounds
Use synonyms
 sterling in the other given country.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, people used to use perfume not frequently and the expenditure on the goods was 250 sterlings in France and the statistic was less than 150
pounds
Use synonyms
 in the
UK
Use synonyms
 in 2010. Spending on books was slightly more than 400,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 sterling in Great Britain,
however
Linking Words
, the trend differs with just 100
pounds
Use synonyms
 in France. It is experienced that demand for technology
such
Linking Words
 as computers
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 about 380 sterling in the first given country and the figures indicate 350,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 in the
UK
Use synonyms
 over the period. Another important device is the camera and expense was marginally more than 350,00
pounds
Use synonyms
 sterling in Great Britain
while
Linking Words
 the index almost halved in other countries in 2010.
Submitted by fidansariyeva74 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, pounds with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • consumer goods
  • chart
  • countries
  • overall
  • compare
  • analyze
  • categories
  • consumer spending
  • trends
  • proportions
  • statistics
  • increase
  • decrease
  • significant
  • notable
  • remarkable
  • substantial
  • considerable
  • determine
  • conclude
  • in conclusion
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