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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that working from home is more beneficial for employees and employers, while others think it reduces productivity and teamwork.

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In the modern era, remote working has become increasingly popular
due to
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 its flexibility and improved
work
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-life balance.
While
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 some people believe that working from home is more effective, others argue that it reduces
productivity
Use synonyms
 and limits teamwork. In my opinion, a balanced approach that combines both methods is the most beneficial. Not only has working from home provided greater flexibility, but it has
also
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 helped
employees
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 manage their
work
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-life balance more effectively. Because remote working allows individuals to maintain full
productivity
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 without being physically present,
employees
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 can
work
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 from any location.
For instance
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, during the COVID-19 pandemic, many
employees
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 successfully continued their
work
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 through online platforms. Had these platforms not existed,
productivity
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 would have been severely disrupted.
Furthermore
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, businesses were not significantly affected by the pandemic
due to
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 the availability of remote
work
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 options.
In contrast
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, face-to-face working promotes a stronger team atmosphere. Scarcely had offices reopened after the pandemic when companies reported improved
productivity
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. If
employees
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 had not returned to offices, they might have experienced communication breakdowns and potential isolation.
Moreover
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, managers can monitor employee progress more effectively in a physical setting, ensuring that tasks are completed efficiently. In conclusion,
while
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 remote working offers flexibility and a better
work
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-life balance, face-to-face interaction fosters a more collaborative and engaging
work
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 environment. Not only does a combination of both methods improve
overall
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productivity
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, but it
also
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 ensures that
employees
Use synonyms
 benefit from the advantages of both approaches.
Therefore
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, adopting a balanced working model would be the most effective way forward.

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task achievement
Consider providing a more robust introduction that clearly outlines your stance on the issue.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use a wider variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow between paragraphs.
task achievement
Ensure that all points presented are expanded upon with detailed explanations and connections to the main argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay presents a well-structured argument with clear points for both sides of the debate.
task achievement
Strong use of relevant examples to illustrate key points, particularly referencing the COVID-19 pandemic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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