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Band 6.5

TRAFFIC AND ACCOMMODATION PROBLEMS ARE INCREASING, AND THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD ENCOURAGE BUSINESS TO MOVE FROM CITIES TO RURAL AREAS. DO THE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGE?

In
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At
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the
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apply
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present,
high
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the high
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 density of
population
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the population
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 in
capital
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the capital
a capital
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 city is
the
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a
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 major
problems
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problem
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 across the world.
As
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In
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 the effort to overcome
with
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apply
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the congestion in
the
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apply
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urban areas, urbanization and industrialization are the promising remedies that the
authority
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authorities
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 should
do
Verb problem
use
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. In
this
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 essay, the pros and cons of expanding the
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
 to
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the contryside
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contryside
Correct your spelling
countryside
 zone will be examined before my conclusion is reached. On the one hand, urbanization can improve the well-being of people living in rural areas as they do not need to leave their
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
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home
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homes
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for working
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to work
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 in the cities,
Correct word choice
where
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which
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where
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 they can have a job near their
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homes
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home
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homes
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.
For example
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, a new
industrail
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industrial
 area in Chonburi province in Thailand
provide
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provides
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a
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apply
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numerous
job's
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jobs
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 position for local residents.
Moreover
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, they can be happier
to stay
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staying
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 with their beloved parents and children
Therefore
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, they can spend more quality time with their family, save cost
for
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of
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 transportation and
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accommodation
accommodations
accomodation
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accommodation
 for living in the big cities,
as well as
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 mitigate the traffic and
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accommodation
accomodation
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accommodation
 problems
On the other hand
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,
industrailization
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industrialization
industrialisation
also
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 some drawbacks. The first drawback is to deteriorate the environment. Because the nature
need
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needs
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 to be replaced by the infrastructure
such
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 as roads, high building, and so on, the environment will be polluted by the waste from industries.
In addition
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, the government need to invest
a
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an
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 enormous amount of state property to construct facilities including hospital, school, and
transporation
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transportation
. To illustrate,
Thai
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the Thai
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 government need to spend 3,000 million Baht to build all facility for the new industrial zone in Phuket, which
these amount
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this amount
these amounts
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 can
use
Wrong verb form
be used
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 to save a lot of people from poverty. In conclusion,
although
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 expanding the business zone to
rural
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a rural
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area
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areas
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 will be disastrous to the environment and worth a billion Baht, its benefits absolutely outweigh its drawbacks
due to
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 effective
solution
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solutions
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 to
high density
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high-density
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 problems, and
generate
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generating
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 income
to
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for
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 local people.

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