IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

This linegrapgh shows the upping tendency in population of Columbia, Yamhill and also Washington in the U.S state of Oregon in the period from 1940 to 2000.

#linegrapgh #tendency #population #columbia #yamhill #washington #oregon #period
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
linegrapgh
Correct your spelling
line graph
 shows the upping tendency in
Use synonyms
population
Add an article
the population
a population
show examples
 of
Columbia
Use synonyms
,
Yamhill
Use synonyms
 and
also
Linking Words
Washington
Use synonyms
 in the
U.S
Correct your spelling
U.S.
 state of Oregon in the period from 1940 to 2000.
According to
Linking Words
 the graph, it can be clearly seen that all three lines
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 increased,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 all of them changed in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different ways.
Columbia
Use synonyms
 had the lowest
population
Use synonyms
 at the start of the count,
for
Change preposition
with
show examples
 about 25000
people
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
compared
Add a missing verb
is compared
show examples
 with
30000
Correct your spelling
30,000
people
Use synonyms
 in
Yamhill
Use synonyms
 and with the highest
population
Use synonyms
reffering
Correct your spelling
according
 to the graph, in
Washington
Use synonyms
 at around 75000
people
Use synonyms
. The years from 1940 to 1970 show that the
population
Use synonyms
 of
Columbia
Use synonyms
 had risen to 36000. It could
be seem
Change the verb form
seem
show examples
 that it was a
little
Correct word choice
small
show examples
 increase, but
anyway
Add a comma
anyway,
show examples
 it's about 40% from the beginning of the
growth
Use synonyms
.
Yamhill
Use synonyms
population
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 rose by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of the starting number, from
30000
Correct your spelling
30,000
 to 45000
people
Use synonyms
. In spite of
this
Linking Words
 two countries had
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
great
growth
Use synonyms
, the biggest increase was noticed in
Washington
Use synonyms
, where the
population
Use synonyms
 increased from 75000 to 125000. By
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2000,
Columbia
Use synonyms
 and
Yamhill
Use synonyms
risen
Add a missing verb
had risen
show examples
 for the same amounts,
like
Replace the word
as
show examples
 they had risen thirty years ago. In 2000
Columbia
Use synonyms
's
population
Use synonyms
has grown
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 35000,
Use synonyms
Yamhill's
Correct word choice
and Yamhill's
show examples
population
Use synonyms
 increased
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 60000 from 1940. Even
the
Correct word choice
though the
show examples
growth
Use synonyms
 of the
population
Use synonyms
 of
Washington
Use synonyms
 between 1940 and 1970 was huge, its
growth
Use synonyms
 for the next thirty years was sharper, from 125000 in 1970 to 240000
people
Use synonyms
 in 2000
Submitted by dnm.best on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: