IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

People nowadays tend to have children in older ages. do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #children #ages #outweigh
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The grown-ups nowadays have
this
Linking Words
 decision as parents to get kids in their middle ages. There are numerous advantages and disadvantages to
have
Change the verb form
having
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 kids
in
Change preposition
at
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 older ages which will be discussed
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the following paragraphs. As far as I am concerned the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. The paramount benefit of
this
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 choice is having less difficulty feelings in parents. As
a
Correct article usage
apply
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proof, you can refer to all young mothers and fathers around you. Most of them feel
tiredness
Replace the word
tired
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 and they always think they lost something about their youth. Regrettably, they are not wrong. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example, imagine a young mommy and daddy who have an adventurous life with
lot
Change the article
a lot
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 of hobbies and
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
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 before they become a mother and a father. Now they should get their mama and papa roles and skip some of their fun times.
In addition
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 to that, the next profit of
this
Linking Words
 chosen option is about the life experience. As life goes on, you become more experienced. You have more
involvements
Fix the agreement mistake
involvement
show examples
 with different issues and
as a
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result
Add a comma
result,
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 you learn a lot from them. So
according to
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 that process, an older person may be a better mom and dad in wisdom aspects because she or he has more maturity than a younger person.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, we might see some cons in that situation.
Age
Use synonyms
 difference problems are not the things that you can ignore. Too
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
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age
Use synonyms
 differences can cause a lot of conflicts in a family and the most important one is the elders are not able to understand the
youngers
Correct your spelling
younger
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 needs and thoughts.
For instance
Linking Words
, I invite you to depict a family
who
Correct pronoun usage
whose
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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mom and dad are in the
age
Use synonyms
 of 50 and the children are about 15. How a 50-year-old man can understand a
teenager
Change noun form
teenager's
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 needs? It is mostly impossible.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
beside
Replace the word
besides
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 that the decision of the good
age
Use synonyms
 for having children depends on the owner, it has acceptable benefits to have kids in old
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
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. You are suitably mature and you have enough knowledge to raise and educate a child by yourself.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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