IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Illiteracy has traditionally been viewed as largely a third world problem. However, it is becoming apparent that in countries such as the USA and Australia, illiteracy rate is on the increase. Discuss possible causes for this and its effect on society. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Nowadays, the illiteracy
rate
Use synonyms
 is increasing at
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 speed of light
in
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apply
show examples
worldwide.
This
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 is mainly
due to
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 financial crisis and less awareness, especially in underdeveloped nations which concern several effects on society
such
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 as inclined in crime
rate
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 and
health
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 issues .
This
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 essay will expatiate both stances with lucid examples. To commence with, the foremost cause is low-budget income. To explain
further
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, the unequal rise in
tution
Correct your spelling
tuition
 fees is one of
major
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the major
show examples
 reasons
of
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for
show examples
 illiteracy as the majority of people can't afford
for
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apply
show examples
their children. To exemplify, the uneducated folks
rate
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 increasing in
Britian
Correct your spelling
Britain
 because of
huge
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the huge
a huge
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 amount of teaching fees in
privtae
Correct your spelling
private
 colleges.
Secondly
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, less awareness is
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another significant concern as they think it is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
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 of income
as well as
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 time.
This
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 means, that they prefer to send their kids
on
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to
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 work to divide their expenses.
According to
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 an American survey, 50% of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 are willing to send their children to work rather than colleges to manage their daily revenues, especially in developing countries like India.
Thus
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, the illiteracy
rate
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 is globally increased. On the other side, there are several consequences of
uppermost
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the uppermost
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 notion.
Firstly
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,
the
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apply
show examples
criminal activities will be increased
such
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 as snatching, robbing etc
due to
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 unemployment. To illustrate, 40%
cases
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of cases
show examples
 of
shop lifting
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shoplifting
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, robbery etc. is to
fullfill
Correct your spelling
fulfil
 their basic needs in Canada.
Moreover
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,
this
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 is not only
effecting
Correct your spelling
affecting
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 the crime ratio but
their
Rephrase
also their
show examples
health
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.
For example
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, they have to work hard on minimum wages to acquire their daily needs
such
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 as grocery,
rent
Correct word choice
and rent
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 which causes several
health
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 problems
such
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 as stress, back issues etc.
To conclude
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, less education is one of
major
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the major
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 concerns in developing and developed countries.
This
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 is mainly
due to
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 poverty, and less awareness.
Additionally
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, it has negative impacts on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
such
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 as increasing criminal activities,
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and work-load
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work-load
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workload
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 pressure on
health
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.

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Content
Provide a clear introduction that states your opinion on the topic. This will help the reader understand your stance from the beginning.
Content
Support your main points with specific examples and evidence. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
Coherence
Organize your essay into paragraphs to improve clarity and coherence.
Language
Avoid using informal language and slang. Stick to formal, academic language.
Language
Pay attention to grammar and sentence structure to ensure clarity and accuracy.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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