IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that it would be better for large companies and industry to move regional areas outside large urban centres. To sing the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #companies #industry #move #areas #centres
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Over the
last
 few
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
 the number of people who prefer to see big
companies
 and industries in
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
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 far from
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 increased significantly,
although
 there are several advantages of
location
Add an article
the location
show examples
 of these
companies
 in
area
Add an article
the area
show examples
 of districts, it can have some disadvantages as well. I will try to discuss both
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
show examples
 and negative
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
 of
this
 and draw a conclusion. On the one
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
relocate
Wrong verb form
relocating
show examples
 large
companies
 and
factories
 to
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 a
lot
 of impact. A primary advantage of moving these
companies
 far from
cities
 is that the amount of air pollution and noise
reduce
Wrong verb form
is reduced
show examples
 in towns.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
this
 type of
companies
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company
show examples
consume
Correct subject-verb agreement
consumes
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 a
lot
 of fossil
fuels
 in
manufacturing
Correct article usage
the manufacturing
show examples
 of goods and they release carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. There
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the quality of air in
cities
 will be good. Another benefit of
this
,
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 rate of traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 decreased.
that
Capitalize word
That
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 is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 big lorries and
other type
Change the wording
another type
other types
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 of
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
 distribute a
lot
 of raw materials and goods to
factories
.
Hence
, the number of transport will be more
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 narrow roads of
cities
 and will
be collapse
Change the verb form
collapse
show examples
 there
On the other hand
 despite
mention
Correct article usage
the mention
show examples
 positive of relocating
factories
 and
companies
 to regional areas. One of the major
drawback
Change to a plural noun
drawbacks
show examples
 of it is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the price of the products grow up.
For instance
, big
companies
 consume much more
fuels
Fix the agreement mistake
fuel
show examples
 than residents of these areas,
therefore
, they should distribute
fuels
Fix the agreement mistake
fuel
show examples
 themselves.
Moreover
, delivery of products
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
 more time and additional
fuels
Fix the agreement mistake
fuel
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 for trucks. Another important
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
demerit is that
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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suffer
Correct subject-verb agreement
suffers
show examples
 from these
companies
. The reason for
this
 is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there are a
lot
 of waste products which could be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
 wild animals and soil. In conclusion,
while
 relocating big
companies
 and
factories
 in areas of district far from
cities
 can offer several positives, there may be some drawbacks too. From my personal point of view
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of it will outweigh the disadvantages
Submitted by @ur_davrik on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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