SOME PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE CHANGES AND PREFET TO DO THINGS THEY ARE GOOD AT, WHILE OTHER PEOPLE LIKE TAKING RISKS AND TRYING NEW THINGS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

#people #changes #prefet #risks

Day by day the world is changing,

people

Correct word choice

and people

show examples

have to

adopt

Correct your spelling

adapt

show examples

the

Change preposition

to the

show examples

changing world.

However

, some

people

do not like to change from

thier

Correct your spelling

their

comfort zone

while

others

accepting

Wrong verb form

show examples

the

risk

and change their life

acording

Correct your spelling

according

to the current situation. I personally believe we want to take the

risk

and try to get

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

better opportunities. Some

people

in the world,

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

do not like to change their traditions

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

some professional characters.

For example

, some

Aurvedic

Correct your spelling

Ayurvedic

doctors still use

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

treat their

patients

Change to a genitive case

patient's

patients'

show examples

old methods

while

they have

chance

Correct article usage

a chance

show examples

to use developed

quipments

Correct your spelling

equipment

Sometime

Replace the word

Sometimes

show examples

that is

becasue

Correct your spelling

because

of their traditions or they will think if they use the new technology their treatment will not work.

However

, it is so happy to see that most of the young generation

Replace the word

likes

show examples

to take

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

and see what is the result, it is a good trend. There is no point

Change preposition

show examples

sticking to one thing, there are

lot

Correct article usage

a lot

show examples

of opportunities we can see out of our comfort zone. Sometimes, it will be

benifitial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

Change preposition

to us

show examples

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it will make easy your current tasks or it will open new

accpects

Correct your spelling

aspects

accepts

for you.

For example

, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

depend on

thier

Correct your spelling

their

jobs, but if someone

think

Change the verb form

thinks

show examples

to leave

Change the verb form

leaving

show examples

the

Change the word

their

show examples

job and

start

Wrong verb form

starting

show examples

their own business will be the best

dicision

Correct your spelling

decision

in their life because doing

Correct article usage

a full

show examples

full time

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

job is

stressfull

Correct your spelling

stressful

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

if you have your own business it will not that much stressful and it will gives more benifits for you. If you

not

Change the verb form

do not

did not

show examples

take the

risk

you can not

experiense

Correct your spelling

experience

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

advantages. In conclusion, I personally believe always we want to think

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

out of frame because it will

gives

Change the verb form

give

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

us more

show examples

chances

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

. Taking

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

is better than

stuck

Add a missing verb

being stuck

show examples

in the old things which they can do perfectly. It will help to develop us both physically and mentally.

Submitted by piuymi.madu on Sat Oct 14 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Provide a more balanced discussion of both views.

lexical resource

Expand on your main points with more specific examples.

grammatical range accuracy

Be more careful with grammar and sentence structure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
46Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Solace
Predictability
Expertise
Honed
Repetition
Stagnation
Innovation
Discovery
Adaptability
Thrill
Calculated risks
Stability
Comfort zone
Self-discovery
Limiting
Routine

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SOME PEOPLE DO NOT LIKE CHANGES AND PREFET TO DO THINGS THEY ARE GOOD AT, WHILE OTHER PEOPLE LIKE TAKING RISKS AND TRYING NEW THINGS. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job.

Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level. However, some say that individuals should pay for their university education. Discuss both of views and give your opinion

In the future ,we will havr more and more leisure time as machines replace many of the tasks we do at home amd at work.Discuss thr challenges and benefits this will bring