IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

People today are increasingly use credit card to make monthly purchases. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #credit #card #purchases
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Financial freedom has always been
a the
Choose an article
a
the
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 prime concern of people. People need a better life. So they take loans and build their
deeam
Correct your spelling
dream
 true. Most of them are using
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Credit
Use synonyms
Card
Use synonyms
 to meet monthly
expense
Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
show examples
. It is more popular and very convenient in the modern era. So I argue, it has more advantages rather than disadvantages. There are enoroumous cosative factors for my arguement. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, there are many
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 using
Credit
Use synonyms
Cards
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
purchase
Fix the agreement mistake
purchases
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it provides cashless
transaction
Fix the agreement mistake
transactions
show examples
 and
convieniance
Correct your spelling
convenience
 for the users, without paying any
aditional
Correct your spelling
additional
 charges.
However
Linking Words
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
banks provide cashback offers and additional discounts to those who use the
cards
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, the users are getting additional points using the Fuel
Card
Use synonyms
 and they can redeem the points and fill the petrol.
Moreover
Linking Words
, E-commerce
platfoms
Correct your spelling
platforms
 like
amazone
Correct your spelling
Amazon
 give
aditional
Correct your spelling
additional
 discounts
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 10
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
.
Linking Words
Finally
Add a comma
Finally,
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 customers get more than a month
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
repay to the
Credit
Use synonyms
Card
Use synonyms
.
Credit
Use synonyms
 scores are increased when we use and make proper
repayment
Fix the agreement mistake
repayments
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, It has some
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
.
Initially
Linking Words
, most of the banks charge a yearly maintenance fee on
cards
Use synonyms
. It may
a
Add a missing verb
be a
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burden for
un used
Correct your spelling
unused
show examples
 customers.
Secondly
Linking Words
, some shops are not accepting
cards
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 because of the swiping machine
coast
Correct your spelling
cost
show examples
 and charges. To recapitulate,
Card
Use synonyms
 payment is becoming
popular
Correct quantifier usage
more popular
show examples
 than other traditional methods. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 people are more convinced with
cards
Use synonyms
. And they get
aditional
Correct your spelling
additional
 discounts and
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
show examples
 rather than others.
However
Linking Words
, when a user
dues
Correct your spelling
does
show examples
 his or her repayment,
bank
Add an article
the bank
show examples
 will charge a huge interest on their transaction. In my opinion,
Credit
Use synonyms
Cards
Use synonyms
 are
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
.
Submitted by shahinka.687 on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples and data to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your ideas are organized and follow a logical structure.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your writing.
grammatical range accuracy
Watch out for minor grammatical errors and strive for more accurate grammar usage.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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