The graph and chart below give information on the average daily and minimum temperatures in degrees Celsius (°C) and the average number of days with rainfall each month for two Australian cities.
In recent years, there
can be
Wrong verb form
has
seen
a rising trend of having surgery to improve the outer look of individuals. Correct your spelling
been
This
can be due to
the set beauty
standards, made by social media
and numerous commercialization done by makeup
industries. I believe that this
can put
dramatic effects on humans, making them feel uncomfortable, about their natural Verb problem
have
beauty
.
Social media
and beauty
bloggers have set high beauty
standards that give inferiority complex to people
. Moreover
, beauty
industries have gone crazy for selling their goods and services by putting up enormous advertisements to attract people
. Also
, there is a trend that has been set on social media
to have pointed noses and bold lips that makeup
surgeries made possible. For example
, botox was the famous surgery for having bold lips, so girls with small lips go for it. Consequently
, it became a trend, and people
that
were conscious about their looks Correct pronoun usage
who
to
got it done. Verb problem
apply
Furthermore
, there are fewer people
that praise the natural beauty
of one
, whereas
, more people
who follow the trends without thinking that it is going to suit them or not.
On the other hand
, our natural beauty
is the uniqueness that is
gifted to us by God. I believe that appreciating one
's simplicity and beauty
is more essential rather
than persuading them to have Rephrase
apply
makeup
abscission. Also
, if one
is having
self-confidence in himself Wrong verb form
has
then
no one
can make them feel uncomfortable about their looks. We should tell ourselves that we are perfect and beautiful, rather than listening to other makeup
influencers and surgeons. As they
are only promoting their business without the concerns that our faces can Correct word choice
They
also
be destroyed by failed surgeries.
In conclusion, the main reason for this
can be the numerous advertisements that are done by makeup
industries and the set beauty
standards on social media
by beauty
bloggers and makeup
artists. I firmly believe that it can have significant impacts on society making individuals feel more insecure and doubtful about their natural beauty
, which can cause more self-depreciation and stress among youngsters.Submitted by anhnguhongmai on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words beauty, media, makeup, people, one with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "set" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stand" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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