The chart below compares the percentage of time Australian mothers and fathers spent helping their children with four activities in 2013. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below compares the percentage of time Australian mothers and fathers spent helping their children with four activities in 2013.

Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar chart
match
Change the verb form
matches
show examples
the spending of time to assist children in Australia by
father
and
mother
in 2013. Which involve
this activities
Change the determiner
this activity
these activities
show examples
; dressing, homework, playing
games
and preparing for bed.
Overall
, the
most
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
percentage was the dressing by
mother
.
However
, the high rate which
include
Wrong verb form
included
show examples
both
father
and
mother
was playing
games
.
While
the low one was the dressing activity by
father
Correct article usage
the father
show examples
.
According to
the shape, the
mother
spending
Wrong verb form
spends
show examples
70% of
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
dressing the kids and there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
a big difference
with
Change preposition
between
show examples
father
Correct article usage
the father
show examples
who consumed only 3%.
In
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
the homework exercise had
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
percentage with dressing but in
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
show examples
proportion. Both
mother
and
father
reached 70% for playing
games
with children as the highest number consumed
toghter
Correct your spelling
together
.
While
there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
the same rate for preparing for bed but lower than playing
games
.
Submitted by maltobi08 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words father, mother, games with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • time spent
  • Australian mothers
  • fathers
  • helping
  • children
  • activities
  • reading
  • homework
  • playing sports
  • general play
  • comparison
  • 2013
  • significantly
  • difference
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