The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in1968 and in 2018

#information #families #country #income

The chart illustrates what families in one country spent weekly

income

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

in 1968 and in 2018. It depicts 8 different

purpose

Fix the agreement mistake

purposes

show examples

food

, housing, fuel and power, clothing and

footware

Correct your spelling

footwear

household

goods

, personal

goods

, transport and

leisure

Overall

, most of

spending

Add an article

the spending

show examples

show

Correct subject-verb agreement

shows

show examples

big

Correct article usage

a big

show examples

change compared to 1968 and 2018,

while

household

goods

doesn't

Change the verb form

don't

show examples

show any difference. In 1968, families spent 35

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

of their weekly

income

food

. 10% of expenses were used for housing and clothing and

footware

Correct your spelling

footwear

. Fuel and power,

household

goods

, transport,

leisure

Correct word choice

and leisure

show examples

were less than 10% of usage. In 2018, 23% of weekly

income

were

Correct subject-verb agreement

was

show examples

used for

leisure

Food

, housing and transport showed about 15 % of the

income

. Fuel and powder, clothing and

footware

Correct your spelling

footwear

household

goods

and personal

goods

were spent less than 10% of that.

Food

took up the biggest expense In 1968,

while

in 2018,

leisure

had the hugest demand.

However

household

goods

showed the same amount of spending at about 8%.

Submitted by 0527.hibiki on Wed Oct 18 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words income, food, household, goods, leisure with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 4 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

161 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Weekly income
Expenditure
Consumption patterns
Cost of living
Discretionary spending
Inflation
Economic indicators
Demographics
Socio-economic factors
Technology advancements
Government policies
Consumerism
Lifestyle changes
Fiscal habits
Budget allocation
Financial priorities
Societal trends
Purchasing power
Income distribution

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The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in1968 and in 2018

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but other people claim that it is the individual’s responsibility. Discuss both the views and give your opinion?

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more children are accessing the Internet unsupervised. This can sometimes put them at risk. What problems do you think parents face when dealing with their children using the Internet? How can this problem be solved?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disanvantages of giving children this message?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.