The diagram belows shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

The diagram belows shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The diagram belows shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.
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This
Linking Words
diagram represents the manufacturing
process
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for making
sugar
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from
sugar
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cane.
Sugar
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is important for our daily use.
Overall
Linking Words
,the
sugar
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cane is cultivated and harvested it is converted into
sugar
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through various
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process
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processes
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. In detail, there are seven steps to convert
sugar
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cane to
sugar
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. The growing period of
sugarcanes
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sugarcane
show examples
is about 12 - 18 months periodically. Harvesting can be done by two methods
by
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apply
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mannually
Correct your spelling
manually
and by mechinal harvesting. Manual harvesting takes
long
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a long
show examples
time to
compelete
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complete
his
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
work
whereas
Linking Words
mechinal
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mechanical
machinal
harvesting takes less time to complete
his
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
work. After harvesting,
third
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the third
show examples
process
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is sugarcanes are crushed and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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produce juice.The juice is been purified and
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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filtered
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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is
fourth
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the fourth
show examples
step involved. The sugarcane juice is heated and it
becames
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becomes
became
syrup. It is evaporated.
Next
Correct article usage
The next
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method is centrifuge
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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means
separates
Wrong verb form
separating
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sugar
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crystals from
syrup
Add an article
the syrup
show examples
.
Linking Words
Last
Correct article usage
The last
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process
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is drying and cooling here
sugar
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is ready. From
this
Linking Words
, sugarcane is manufactured within a period of
18months
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18 months
and
produce
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produces
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sugar
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for daily usage. There are
millions
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millions of
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tons of
sugar
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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produced from sugarcane. People consuming
sugar
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in large
quantity
Fix the agreement mistake
quantities
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will cause
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
health problems.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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