Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

#governments #money #education #recreation #sports

It is often argued that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

governments should allocate more funds

Change preposition

show examples

education

than

leisure

and

sports

activities

. I completely disagree with

this

opinion and think that funds allocated

Change preposition

show examples

recreation and

sports

activities

are more important than

education

. First of all, I believe that soft

skills

could be developed through

leisure

and

sports

activities

. Soft

skills

are the key factors in

education

that cannot be taught by a lesson. The only way to develop soft

skills

is by providing the opportunity to deal with

leisure

and

sports

activities

For example

, students who actively do

sports

were relatively good in their studies compared to others

according to

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

surveys performed in the United States. That’s why it is more important to invest more money

Change preposition

show examples

recreation and

sports

activities

than

Change preposition

show examples

education

Secondly

country

Add an article

the country

a country

show examples

needs an educated workforce with

Remove the article

apply

show examples

good health.

Otherwise

, the government will have to spend more money on health services rather than investing it

Change preposition

show examples

education

leisure

activities

. Health professionals suggest that these

activities

are the main factors which help

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people to be healthy.

For instance

, some researchers illustrated that the countries

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

spent more on

education

failed to

surview

Correct your spelling

survive

in the economic competition

due to

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

healthy

Correct article usage

a healthy

show examples

workforce.

Thus

, the investment

Change preposition

show examples

leisure

activities

overweight

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

education

To conclude

, I strongly believe that the government should spend more funds on recreation and

leisure

activities

than

education

. Because those

activities

could help the people to develop their soft

skills

and to be a healthy person.

Submitted by kavindagehan17 on Wed Oct 18 2023

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

fundamental
workforce
fosters
innovation
inequality
circumstances
outcomes
hygiene
private sector
initiatives
engaged
stability
cohesion
national pride
economic development
societal progress

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Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, people are now living longer than before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for government. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extend do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the cases?Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

University students often focus on one subject. However, some people think that universities should encourage students to learn a range of other subjects. To what extent do you agree or disagree?