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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

These days more and more people are going to other countries for a significant period of time either to find a job or study. There are clearly may benefits to doing this, but people who live abroad can also face some difficulties. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living and working in a foreign country.

#people #countries #period #time #job #study #face #difficulties #country
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n modern times, there is a growing trend towards immigrating to a foreign country for an extended time period to achieve goals both professionally and academically.
While
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this
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 trend can be associated with some drawbacks, I would argue that there are obviously several benefits regarding various positive characteristics. The main disadvantage of residing in another country is that individuals may find it difficult in a society with a variety of values, rules, traditions or even religions. To put it differently, were
people
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 to serve as intolerant characters with new cultures, they would conflict with host communities.
This
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 may result in a sense of dissatisfaction to the extent that immigrants regret their decision to reside abroad.
For example
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, studies suggested that it is hard for the majority of Asians living abroad to be compatible with Western cultures.
Consequently
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,
people
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 may be placed in hard situations personally,
although
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 difficulties can enhance them differently. Notwithstanding, indisputably, a foreign country can open up numerous opportunities. The first merit is a higher level of income, particularly in the case of relocating to a developed nation, because they land in a well-paid profession.
Furthermore
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, with various well-equipped educational systems,
people
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 can attend high-quality universities, leading to an advancement in their academic careers. Ultimately, as
people
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 are obliged to build a connection with many individuals from different nationalities, they improve their social relationship skills,
such
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 as speaking the foreign language fluently, followed by a more independent, self-confident, and literally reliable character in their personal life. In conclusion,
although
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 living in a society with various cultures may impose immigrants on some issues, it is undeniable that
this
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 enables them to act as well-rounded
people
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 in a variety of aspects of life.
Submitted by ali.m.mohammdianb on

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coherence cohesion
Use appropriate transitions to create a more cohesive structure. Try to use more varied sentence structures to improve coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the question more explicitly and provide more specific examples to support your points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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