You and a friend have both been accepted to a study abroad program in Paris, France. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: •Congratulate him/her for also being accepted •Ask him/her if he/she would like to be your roommate •Discuss possible activities that the two of you could do together

Hello Rana, I am writing to congratulate you for accepting the offer letter .
Additionally
,I want to let you know that the flight tickets are confirmed. First and foremost, I would like to discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the accommodation.One of my family
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
show examples
who lives in
paris
Change the capitalization
Paris
show examples
is looking for two tenants.They invited me to stay with them.I felt
this
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
be a good idea to share the condo with them .So that I might not feel homesick during the initial days .
Moreover
, they will help me in finding
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
part time
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
job.If you are comfortable you can accompany me. After attending
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college we have
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
of activities to participate
.
Change preposition
in.
show examples
We can take part in
Trecking
Correct your spelling
Tracking
,Swimming and Cycling .All these events are hosted by the College.
Additionally
, the College has the best Library in the City .We can have
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
time over
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
.I'm feeling very excited to
persue
Correct your spelling
pursue
my undergrad in Paris. I'm looking forward
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
your reply. Yours lovingly
vikram
Change the capitalization
Vikram
show examples
Submitted by vicky.kallem on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that the response covers all aspects of the prompt. Make sure to congratulate your friend and ask about being roommates and discuss possible activities in detail.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the organization of ideas and use appropriate linking words to create a more cohesive and coherent letter. Additionally, include a proper greeting and closing for the letter.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: