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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagrams show how the bee makes honey and the stages in the production of honey. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The diagrams show how the bee makes honey and the stages in the production of honey. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features and making comparisons where relevant.
#diagrams #show #bee #honey #stages #production #information #features #comparisons
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The diagrams above delineate
honey
Use synonyms
 production stages by the bee and manufactory . Looking from an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective, it is readily apparent that
this
Linking Words
 circular process is comprised of the main 6 stages of how bees make
honey
Use synonyms
 and man-made 5 stages of production.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the queen bee puts her egg in a honeycomb, which becomes a larva in the next three days, before growing up totally in a week. After more than three weeks bee leaves the hive to collect nectar from different flowers and gather all nectar in the hive as
honey
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, a man-made process occurs, which commences with removing the honeycomb from the hive by be beekeeper. All honeycomb is poured together in the machine to extract
honey
Use synonyms
. Eventually, the boiling process happens to clean it from toxic materials.
Finally
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 product is collected in jars so that the end product is ready to retail.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words honey with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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