IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

It is impossible to help all people around the world in need so governments should focus on people from their own country. To what extent do you agree or disagree? (Write 250 words.)

#people #world #governments #focus #country
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The number of individuals who live all over the
world
Use synonyms
 in
a different countries
Correct the article-noun agreement
different countries
a different country
show examples
 to desire
governments
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’s assistance are on the rise; because many negative
crisises
Correct your spelling
crises
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 happen continuously ; resulting in
people
Use synonyms
 all around the
world
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request
Wrong verb form
requesting
show examples
 some measure to advocate their daily quality of life. I am a strong advocate of
this
Linking Words
 approach, which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
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 method I partially agree
and
Change preposition
with and
show examples
 disagree
, and
Change preposition
with, and
show examples
the
Change the word
its
show examples
 benefits
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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will be covered in
this
Linking Words
 essay. On the one hand, one of the most obvious benefits of developed
people
Use synonyms
’s quality of life daily routine for individuals’s meeting needs in their
country
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 able to inform a more efficient
developing
Replace the word
development
show examples
 and less a negative effect approach
that is
Linking Words
 caused by all
people
Use synonyms
 or the
governments
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 in each
country
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; because it is impossible to help all
people
Use synonyms
 around the
world
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 in need so
governments
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 should focus on
people
Use synonyms
 from their own
country
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.
For instance
Linking Words
,
in stead
Correct your spelling
instead
show examples
 of solving the problem one part at
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 time,
governments
Use synonyms
 must solve and manage everything at the same time; it reduces
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
show examples
 less
effective
Change the word
effectively
show examples
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
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 it should be.
This
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 is the main reason why
governments
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 should focus on their
country
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.
On the other hand
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,
governments
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 are able to help all
people
Use synonyms
 from around the
world
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 from their own aspect to group together in each corporate from a different countries to exchange knowledge and experience in
governments
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 their
country
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,
For example
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, in 1961, there was causing “ASEAN”, which is the Association of South East Asian Nation that came to be co-worker for working together to solve problems and help each other economically and many more
such
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 as social, cultural, scientific or technological aspects. In
concussion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
show examples
, Despite the solving of
governments
Use synonyms
 and corporate around the
world
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 approach;
it is clear that
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 all of the
method
Change to a plural noun
methods
show examples
 have a difference
solving
Change preposition
in solving
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
; it is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 matter of how convenient each
Use synonyms
governments
Change to a singular noun
government
show examples
 is to help their
people
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • limited resources
  • moral obligation
  • global stability
  • economic impact
  • domestic issues
  • international aid
  • diplomatic relationships
  • resource allocation
  • healthcare
  • education
  • infrastructure
  • national priorities
  • desperate need
  • indirect benefit
  • goodwill
What to do next:
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