Topic: The other people who need employment have to compete with younger ones. What problems can this create? What are some solutions?

#topic #people #employment #ones #create

The competition

Correct article usage

Competition

show examples

in society plays a crucial role to be able for us to reach a better quality of life.

However

, one of the problems can be created noticeably

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

makes

Verb problem

creates

show examples

the gap between generations and many accompanying problems . Yet, it can be solved by the government's measures to bond each

generation

with another

such

as organizing social activities or improving the salary for the old

generation

. The foremost problem is caused by the different health of each

generation

For example

, the old has weaker health than the young. Their muscles can work effectively the same as before. It should be recognised that

this

problem decreases the amount of work the old people do.

However

not to mention

that the old people have lots of valuable experience than the young, so they deserve to have benefits in

this

competition

such

as improving their salary.

On the other hand

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young people should compete with themselves rather than with the old. First of all, they have good health, youthfulness and dynamism.

This

can help the young work effectively rather than the old.

Secondly

, the main source of

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

is from the young. It means that the competition ought to happen with each other to be able to develop better.

Although

it can distance society from the younger

generation

, it is necessary for us to change and advance our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

. In conclusion, there are indeed various consequences associated with the elderly competing for jobs with the younger

generation

, but they can be resolved once appropriate measures are urgently applied.

Submitted by [email protected] on Tue Oct 24 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic: The other people who need employment have to compete with younger ones. What problems can this create? What are some solutions?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Newspaper have influenced people's ideas and opinions. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative situation?

Some eople believe that the radio is more enjoyable and practical than TV. Do you agree ?

You have recently moved to a new city. Write a letter to an English-speaking friend. In your letter Explain why you moved Describe your new city Tell him/her other news Began your letter as: Dear…

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that professional athletes serve as positive role models for young people, while others argue that their behavior both on and off the field can have a negative influence. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.