IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that they are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these bills and give your own opinion.

#people #time #loss #species #plants #animals #bills
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The issue of
loss
Use synonyms
 of particular species of
plants
Use synonyms
 and
animals
Use synonyms
 has been becoming more popular these days through the risen interest of media
such
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 as TV, news,
journals
Correct word choice
and journals
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.
While
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 some people believe that
this
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 is the most essential issue in our world,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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others argue that there are several more crucial troubles including global warming,
water
Use synonyms
shortage
Use synonyms
 or weather
unpredictibility
Correct your spelling
unpredictability
. I, personally, believe in the latter belief, in
this
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 essay I will argue
the
Remove the article
apply
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both sides and explain
why
Rephrase
apply
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my perspective. People
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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state that the
loss
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 of particular
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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 of
animals
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 and
plants
Use synonyms
 has
devastating
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a devastating
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 effect on the earth. Considering the interconnectedness of nature
this
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arguement
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argument
 would be understandable which means if bees disappear, the number of pests which destroy crops
skyrockets
Correct subject-verb agreement
skyrocket
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.
This
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proccess
Correct your spelling
process
 may lead to fundamental
crops
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crop
show examples
shortage
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 in the long term.
Furthermore
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, since
everythings
Correct your spelling
everything
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature, like
algeas
Correct your spelling
algae
,
animals
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,
plants
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,
humans
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and humans
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links
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link
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in
Change preposition
with
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 each other there could be
dramatic
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the dramatic
a dramatic
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 harmful
impact
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impacts
show examples
 on us which we can not determine with our current experiment and understanding. The
propenents
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proponents
 of
belief
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the belief
a belief
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 that we have more essential troubles argue that with our modern
technologies
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technologies,
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 we are able to solve
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this problems
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
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.
For instance
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, if a bacteria
disappear
Correct subject-verb agreement
disappears
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, we can cover the harmful results of
this
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 vanishing as long as we define the function of that bacteria.
Additionally
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, there are more
threating
Correct your spelling
threatening
threats
 and wide-ranging
enviromental
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environmental
 problems
such
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 as climate change,
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water
Correct word choice
and water
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shortage
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. Taking
water
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shortage
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, unless prevent huge amounts of unnecessary
water
Use synonyms
 usage, we will face a
water
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shortage
Use synonyms
.
Considering the
Verb problem
The
show examples
water
Use synonyms
as
Correct your spelling
is
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 a fundamental liquid for the whole life forms and there is no chance
to survive
Change preposition
of surviving
show examples
 any life form in the world without
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
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. So
that
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apply
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making an effort to protect our
water
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 resources seems more essential to us. Turning to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
climate change, which has
Correct article usage
a broaden
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broaden
Replace the word
broad
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 impact on our
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
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. One of the numerous detrimental effects of
that is
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 rising sea levels which may result in a disappearing
in
Change preposition
apply
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shoreline and
loss
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 of huge parts of lands. In conclusion,
while
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Use synonyms
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
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 of particular species of
plants
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 and
animals
Use synonyms
 has bad effects on us, I firmly believe that we have more crucial troubles.
Ensuring
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To ensure
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 the sustainability of our world,it is important to make a list
according to
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 emergency levels of
concerns
Fix the agreement mistake
concern
show examples
.
Submitted by ilaydailday on

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