IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Responsibility of reducing and preventing global environmental damage lies with politicians as there is little that individuals can do to solve this problem. Do you agree or disagree?

#responsibility #damage #politicians #individuals
In today's world, some people argue that decreasing the risk of environmental
problems
 and protecting our Earth are
politicians
' responsibilities. In my perspective, concerning
this
 statement,
while
 it seems to be reasonable to some extent I hold a belief that there are several aspects worth being considered. One advantage of
politicians
' ability to handle
problems
 is their logical thinking and an extensive relationship. To explain,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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politicians
 who have experience,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can build a
plan
 to solve
problems
 by
sciential
Correct your spelling
scientific
show examples
 methods and use their relationship to call for support from scientists and non-governmental organizations as well.
For instance
, to
solving
Wrong verb form
solve
show examples
problems
 effectively, the
politicians
 may create a meeting or rally to publish their
detail
Replace the word
detailed
show examples
plan
 and action
plan
.
Therefore
, it is beneficial for the community to have the
politicians
' responsibilities to reduce global environmental damage.
However
, I would argue that there are several benefits of individuals
join
Wrong verb form
joining
show examples
this
 protecting our environment progress is their unity. To be more precise, for big
society
Replace the word
societal
show examples
problems
, it is
drawback
Add an article
a drawback
show examples
 for our society to have not unity of individuals to handling
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
problems
. In detail, by responding, they can create a big wave to gain goals of environment protection fast
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the short-term. Another reason supporting my view is financial contribution. As we
knew
Wrong verb form
know
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, an extensive
plan
 must need good financial sources
such
 as operating
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
, so people can contribute a lot of money
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 these plans.
For instance
, they can donate some money to operate a factory that produces organic products.
As a result
, individuals
also
 play a significant role in reducing global environmental damage. In conclusion,
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 my perspective, I mostly disagree that decreasing the risk of environmental
problems
 and protecting our Earth are
politicians
' responsibilities
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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