The diagram below shows how instant noodles are manufactured. Summaries the information by selceting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how instant noodles are manufactured.

Summaries the information by selceting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The diagram represents how
quick
Change the word
quickly
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noddles are manufactured.
Overall
, it is clear from the picture that manufacturing
noodles
involves eight different processes. The steps like flout
is
Change the verb form
are
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stored in storage silos, converting
dough
strips
into
noodles
discs and
lastly
Add a comma
lastly,
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labelling part is done.
Firstly
, flour is brought and stored in storage silos.
Then
mixer process is carried out by mixing water and oil to the flour.
Furthermore
, rollers are used to transform
mixer
Correct article usage
the mixer
show examples
into
dough
sheets. After the conversion, it is processed
to
Change preposition
into
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strips
called
dough
strips
.
Secondly
, transformed
dough
strips
are modified as
noodles
Fix the agreement mistake
noodle
show examples
discs
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with
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through
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with
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the help of
Correct article usage
a machine
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machine
Correct article usage
a machine
show examples
. In the sixth stage,
cooking
Add an article
the cooking
a cooking
show examples
segment is done which brings shape to the
noodles
. Immediately,
drying
Correct article usage
a drying
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procedure gets implemented in order to make it dry. Before the
last
phase, vegetables and addition to spices are added
in
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to
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cups for flavouring. At
last
, labelling combined with
sealing
Correct article usage
the sealing
show examples
factor gets involved for the completeness of instant
noodles
before reaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the customers.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words noodles, dough, strips with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufactured
  • ingredients
  • dough
  • rolled out
  • thin strips
  • steaming process
  • partially cooked
  • fried
  • dehydrating
  • packaged
  • distribution
  • quality control
  • standards
  • flavoring powder
  • sauce packet
  • traditional pasta
  • dehydration
  • instant cooking
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