Some people say that competitive sports have advantages for people from different groups and countries, while others believe that competitive sports only create problems between people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is widely believed that competitive

sports

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can bring certain benefits to

people

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from diverse backgrounds.

However

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, there's

also

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the argument for the opposite to be true. Personally, I can neither agree nor disagree with the statement for a variety of reasons that I will explore in

this

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essay. I partly agree with the idea that competitive

sports

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can be an advantage for different groups of

people

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. One of the advantages is how it can help promote the sharing of cultures from around the world, helping us respect each other differences. Through large sporting events,

people

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from around the world will converge to watch the games, creating opportunities for knowledge of culture to be spread. The event can

also

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act as a chance for the host country to present its culture to the world, improving soft power in the process. An example of

this

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is the Tokyo Olympics back in 2020. Research has shown a significant rise in the number of Japanese classes being open to foreigners, which in turn helped promote the country's image.

On the other hand

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, I

also

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believe that there are some disadvantages to competitive

sports

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. One of which is the discourse it creates when matches become too heated. Sometimes,

due to

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the result of a bad

sports

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match,

people

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can lose their ability to calmly evaluate the match and disregard normal manners in favour of their pride and ego.

This

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leads to reckless behaviours that can bring harm to others, especially those directly involved with the game's outcome.

For example

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, in 2015, enraged football fans from Vietnam sent death threats and cyber-bullied a referee for the ASEAN Football Cup finals of that year where Vietnam lost the finals.

This

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then

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prompted the referee to struggle with anxiety for a long time afterwards. In conclusion, even though it's undeniable that competitive

sports

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have brought many

people

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together and allowed for the sharing and promotion of different cultures, I believe that we

also

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shouldn't look away from the unfortunate consequences born from the human desire to compete.

yeshomeclassWed Oct 25 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on only one main idea and provides clear and relevant supporting details.

lexical resource

Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your main points.

grammatical range accuracy

Use a wider range of grammar structures and sentence types to showcase your language proficiency.

7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

340 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Competitive sports
Advantages
Unity
Friendship
Cultural exchange
Understanding
Physical health
Mental health
Life skills
Problems
Rivalry
Hostility
Inequality
Discrimination
Pressure
Stress
Opinion

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Some people say that competitive sports have advantages for people from different groups and countries, while others believe that competitive sports only create problems between people. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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