The line graph below shows US consumers' average annual expenditures on cell phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010.

The line graph below shows US consumers' average annual expenditures on cell

phone and residential phone services between 2001 and 2010.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph compares how much money was yearly spent on two kinds of
phone
services categorised into
cell
phones
and residential
phones
by Americans over a 9-year period.
It is clear that
the expenditure on residential
phones
fell over the period shown,
while
cell
phones
became by far more popular among American
phone
service users. In 2001, almost no one in the USA tended to use
cell
phones
as a means of calling, compared to the nearly 700
dollars
they spent on residential
phone
services. Over the next 6 years, the average amount of money spent on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cell
phones
increased dramatically
while
this
amount for residential
phones
dropped. In early 2006, the same sum of money was expended for the reason of calling through both
cell
and residential
phones
being just over 500
dollars
.
This
amount for the
cell
phone
continued to increase reaching around 750
dollars
by 2010
whereas
residential users seemed to have a fall of nearly 150
dollars
to hardly 400$ in that year.
Submitted by z.rajabi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words phone, cell, phones, dollars with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "fell" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: