IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The line graph illustrates three different kind of crimes that occurred in Newport city centre between 2003 and 2012.

The line graph illustrates three different kind of crimes that occurred in Newport city centre between 2003 and 2012.
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In the
Change preposition
The
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line
Add a comma
line,
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 graphic depicts the
rate
Use synonyms
 of some type of
crimes
Fix the agreement mistake
crime
show examples
occurances
Correct your spelling
occurrences
 in the
newport
Change the capitalization
Newport
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 city centre
from
Change preposition
between
show examples
 2003 and 2012. The highest
rate
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
crime
Change preposition
of crime
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 type in shows for burglary with approximately 3700
incidents
Use synonyms
 that
has
Change the verb form
have
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occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
 in
the
Change the article
apply
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2004 starting with less
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
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 3500 and
then
Linking Words
number
Use synonyms
 rapidly
experience
Wrong verb form
experienced
show examples
 downfall
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Change the article
apply
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2008.
Linking Words
While the
Correct word choice
The
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 trend
fluctuate
Change the verb form
fluctuates
show examples
 for car theft with
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 highest
rate
Use synonyms
 ranging in 2600
Use synonyms
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
unfortunate
incidents
Use synonyms
 and
following
Wrong verb form
followed
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with
Change preposition
by
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 the lowest
rate
Use synonyms
 in 2008 with only 2000.
while
Linking Words
 the lowest
crime
Use synonyms
 was for robbery, with a mere stable fluctuation of
rate
Use synonyms
, in only starts with 600
Use synonyms
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
incidents
Use synonyms
 and in 2012 at just the same amount of
crime
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
.
overall
Linking Words
, the highest peak of
crime
Use synonyms
rates
Change the noun form
rate
show examples
incidents
Use synonyms
 in
newport
Change the capitalization
Newport
show examples
 city would be in the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2004 with burglary ranging more than 3700
incidents
Use synonyms
 and the lowest and safest time was 2008, showing the major drawbacks for all
Use synonyms
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
 of
incidents
Use synonyms
occurances
Correct your spelling
occurrences
occurrence
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words rate, crime, incidents, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • recorded
  • trends
  • criminal activity
  • categories
  • theft
  • assault
  • vandalism
  • graph
  • x-axis
  • y-axis
  • number of crimes
  • visual representation
  • changes
  • crime rates
  • fluctuating pattern
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