lt is important to ensure that children with a wide range of abilities and from a variety of social backgrounds mix with each other at schoo/. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is
told
Verb problem
said
show examples
that mixing at
school
children with a wide range of skills and from different social backgrounds is important. I totally agree with
this
crucial need to mix all these
people
.
Firstly
, it is essential t show to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young
people
how varied is our world. Children
tand
Correct your spelling
tend
to have a clear lack of an ample vision.
This
is the reason that explains how it is crucial to join varied boys and girls at
school
to develop
this
more ample and realistic vision of the world.
For example
, when I was young, I met at
school
a girl that came from a very poor family and I learnt from her the cruel reality
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
miseria
Correct your spelling
misery
on earth.
Secondly
, not mixing
people
at
school
would
meen
Correct your spelling
mean
that society still tends to separate
people
by their origins, money or other ethnic aspects. Nowadays, we are in a society that fights discrimination and separating the younger
people
will not follow
an common values
Correct the article-noun agreement
common values
a common value
show examples
and violence could arrive very quickly.
For instance
, a
Harvad
Correct your spelling
Harvard
study in 2016 showed how children that have been isolated for their social background tend to become violent regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
other groups.
To conclude
, mixing the youngers with varied profiles is important to ensure
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
inclusive education and to reduce violence between social groups. I really think that
this
is the way to build a stable and equal society.
Submitted by santos_dij on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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