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Writing Samples
Band 8

Automatic cars are advancing so fast in recent years. What are the reasons for this improvement? Is it true that the increase in automatic cars results in the decline of vehicle production?

#cars #years #improvement #results #decline #vehicle #production
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There has been a sharp increase in the number of driverless transits from the 1970s onwards. There are two reasons for
this
 rise;
besides
, the automatic car leap does not necessarily mean a productivity decrease in car production, as we will see in the following essay. There are two main reasons why robotic autos are advancing so rapidly.
Firstly
, self-driving cars are proven to be safer and are claimed to have greater problem-solving abilities than those of humans, as they have been upgraded with the key feature of predicting any possibilities of incidents
such
 as road collisions or traffic congestion so that the safety of users can be guaranteed. Tesla trucks,
for instance
, are programmed to switch to autopilot mode if either a crash is on the horizon or the drivers are found incapable of monitoring the situation.
Secondly
, self-driving capabilities free up the time people spend driving for other purposes. Since vehicles could do some or all of the driving, it may be reasonable for owners to take some breath, socialize, or finish their assignments.
Furthermore
,
this
 automotive breakthrough allows those who are challenged by physical limitations, including older and disabled individuals, to enjoy significantly greater travel autonomy. It is by no means true that the growing number of robotic cars coincides with the degradation of automotive manufacturing; in fact, the reverse is true. It was not until users started to purchase access to a range of robotic transit that manufacturers could mass-produce more efficient and viable means of transportation. A clear example can be seen with electric vans that entitle families to go on camping trips without the fear of long driving days thanks to their spacious back seats and driver assistance systems. In conclusion, driverless travel is preferable than ever before, for it ensures safety and offers convenience to humans, and it seems that the more popular automatic autos become, the higher turnover car production has.
Submitted by banhbao0565 on

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Structure
Try to ensure a clear and logical progression of your ideas throughout the essay. While your argument is generally well-structured, in some places, transitions between ideas or paragraphs could be smoother to enhance readability.
Examples
Although you've included relevant examples to support your points, working on integrating these examples more seamlessly into your argument could strengthen your essay. This means not just stating an example but also elaborating on how it directly supports your point.
Conclusion
For an even stronger essay, aim to develop your conclusion further by succinctly summarizing your main points and reinforcing your stance on the topic. A compelling conclusion leaves a lasting impression.
Task Response
You have effectively addressed the prompt, providing clear arguments and relevant examples to support your points. This comprehensive approach demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, providing a clear overview and a strong final statement on the topic. These structural elements are essential for guiding the reader through your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
The essay demonstrates a good grasp of coherence and cohesion, with a logical flow of ideas and well-structured paragraphs. This makes your argument easy to follow and engage with.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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