Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers must work in the country where they were trained. Others think that they should have the right to work in another country if they wanted to. Discuss both of these points of view and express your own opinion.
In some
places
, professional jobs
opportunities for Change the noun form
job
doctor
and engineers Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
are believe
to just Change the verb form
are believed
work
in their
Change the word
the
countries
that they have been training
, Replace the word
trained
however
, others think that working
opportunities should be Replace the word
work
open
up wider and are able to let them Wrong verb form
opened
work
in other country
if they want to. In my opinion, I believe that they should be free to Change the wording
another country
other countries
work
at the places
they wish for.
Working in the places
people
have been training, might result
as
higher efficiency Change preposition
in
while
working. For instant
, working as doctors in a hospital Replace the word
instance
that
Correct word choice
where
individuals
have been spending their time being intern
may give better Fix the agreement mistake
interns
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
while
working, as they may feel less pressure and anxiety due to
how use
to the environment they are around Wrong verb form
used
while
training. Moreover
, working in some countries
or in the same places
they have been trained, are
like payback to Correct subject-verb agreement
is
its
own Correct pronoun usage
their
countries
. Furthermore
, less population of peoples
are interested in being doctors and Fix the agreement mistake
people
engineer
, Fix the agreement mistake
engineers
due to
its
difficulty Change the word
the
while
learning and Change preposition
of
long
period of learning time. Correct article usage
the long
As a
result
, in many countries
those kinds of Add a comma
countries,
working
jobs lack Verb problem
apply
people
doing it
.
Correct pronoun usage
them
In contrast
, giving people
chances to explore and work
in different countries
and places
help
them develop their skills and Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
give
them Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
wider
view of Add an article
a wider
working
aspect. Correct article usage
the working
Additionally
, individuals
get to meet new kinds of people
and learn new things that they are not able to learn in their own countries
and in the end, they can bring back those new educational and improve their countries
. Furthermore
, nowadays many countries
pay higher wages then
Replace the word
than
its
own Correct pronoun usage
their
countries
due to
how growing it is. For example
, America pays much higher wages being an engineer than those working in Thailand, since, people
in America pays
higher taxes. Change the verb form
pay
Despite
, some Correct pronoun usage
Despite this
individuals
may prefer to work
there and get paid better and
Correct word choice
apply
while
enjoying new experiences.
To sum up
, working in the place people
have been training may result
better
as they have Change preposition
in better
less
worries Change the quantifier
fewer
due to
the used to of
the environment they areChange preposition
apply
,
Change preposition
in, moreover
moreover
, it also
helps pay back its countries
and help with the lack of jobs. On the other hand
, working in different places
give individuals
wider
view of Correct article usage
a wider
working
aspect, Correct article usage
the working
furthermore
some Add a comma
furthermore,
countries
offer better wages and working lives.
50 minutesSubmitted by thanapat1229 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your introduction and conclusion are clear and well-developed.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more diverse and precise words.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and coherence.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example