Students in a school should learn academic subjects and pass exams. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking, and woodwork can be learned from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?
The pivotal duty of students is studying academic subjects and passing exams at school,
therefore
vocational learning should be taught only by family. I believe to understand
skills is Change the verb form
understanding
benefitial
for their future.
Correct your spelling
beneficial
Firstly
, with regards
to Fix the agreement mistake
regard
the
brain capacities, it is easier to gain Correct article usage
apply
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
in
a young age. Instil a Change preposition
at
vary
Replace the word
variety
non academic
subjects at school will reach all students, which Add a hyphen
non-academic
also
includes with
those who Change preposition
apply
doesn't
have Change the verb form
don't
family
capability to enrich them with Add an article
the family
the
multidisciplinary skills. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, an orphan may has
a limitation with money, and family support. Teachers Change the verb form
have
entail
to stand up and equip them so they can become Verb problem
are required
a
well-rounded Correct article usage
apply
person
.
Fix the agreement mistake
people
Secondly
, a fun learning activities
have been helping student to decrease their stress levels that Correct the article-noun agreement
fun learning activities
a fun learning activity
caused
by studying an academic. Cookery, dressmaking, Add a missing verb
are caused
woodwork
are intriguing things for youngsters, not only Correct word choice
and woodwork
enhance
their motoricWrong verb form
enhancing
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
help
them to relax. Take a cookery class as an example after a long day of math studies, chopping garlic and watching a butter Wrong verb form
helping
to
melt will be a remedy.
Fix the infinitive
apply
To conclude
it is important for scholar
to derive an academic lesson, but learning about skills Fix the agreement mistake
scholars
also
a thing we can't put our Add a missing verb
is also
back
off. It will be easier to maximize their fresh brain, and Fix the agreement mistake
backs
also
it is a method for them to stay in peace.Rephrase
apply
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task response
Make sure to directly address the prompt by providing a clear stance and supporting it throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure by organizing your ideas more coherently. Use paragraphs to separate different points and provide clear transitions between them.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more diverse and precise words. Avoid repetitive language and consider using synonyms to add variety.
grammatical range
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and ensure that your sentences are well-constructed. Review the rules of grammar and practice using them consistently.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite