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Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

The picture below shows the plan of a museum in 1998 and after some changes were made in it in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

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The given floor plan delineates the information related to the change in the architecture of the museum during the time period between 1998 and 2008. Looking from an
overall
 perspective, it is readily apparent that, some new areas were opened in 2008,
as well as
 the permanent
exhibition
 space was abated. In 1998, in front of
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
 entrance or exit, was the
garden
area
, which was located between the cafe and the entry gate.
However
,
this
 was changed in 2008, during which entry of the
garden
 was decorated with some fountains and at the upper left corner,
cafe
Correct article usage
a cafe
show examples
 sitting
area
 was opened. Which was connected with the cafe. The
area
 that was consumed by
shop
Correct article usage
the shop
show examples
, WC and bags and coats room was shifted to
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
 place since that
area
 was utilised for the permanent
exhibition
 rooms. The shop which was on the right
side
 of the entrance during 1998, was shifted to the left
side
 between the entrance and the bags and coats
area
 in 2008. On the left
side
 of the
garden
,
area
Add an article
the area
show examples
 was consumed by the permanent
exhibition
.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
 in 2008, it was utilised for
differet
Correct your spelling
different
 purposes
such
 as
temporary
Correct article usage
a temporary
show examples
exhibition
 room, on
left
Add an article
the left
show examples
side
 of the
garden
. On the top of
temporary
Correct article usage
the temporary
show examples
exhibition
area
,
restaurant
Correct article usage
a restaurant
show examples
 was opened.
Submitted by khushiaggarwal255 on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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