IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

All children should be made to wear school uniforms. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #school #uniforms
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I believe that
school
Use synonyms
 uniform is required to
wear
Wrong verb form
be worn
show examples
while
Linking Words
 in
school
Use synonyms
 and in any
school
Use synonyms
 program. Because it is important to maintain
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
balance among
students
Use synonyms
. There are
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 reasons
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
Linking Words
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
show examples
,
one
Use synonyms
 is if there is no specific
dress
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 to wear in
school
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,
then
Linking Words
 the problem that will
rise
Correct your spelling
arise
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 among
students
Use synonyms
 is that
one
Use synonyms
 can face negative remarks from their peers about wearing
Use synonyms
dress
Add an article
a dress
the dress
show examples
. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
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example, rich friends will wear dresses
those
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 are too brandy, and expensive,
where
Correct word choice
whereas
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 other friends, those who are not able to buy brandy
Use synonyms
dress
Fix the agreement mistake
dresses
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 will get
bad
Add an article
a bad
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 reaction from their friends. And,
this
Linking Words
 kind of act will impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their mind. And
this
Linking Words
 impact could lead to their family, which will cause more
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, if
one
Use synonyms
 student does not
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 any earning source,
thus
Linking Words
 they are not able to buy
Use synonyms
dress
Add an article
a dress
the dress
show examples
 or any other things,
for
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
reason
Add a comma
reason,
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 they are totally
depend
Replace the word
dependent
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 on their own family income, if
one
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's
students
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 family does not have
good
Add an article
a good
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 income,
then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 kind of demand to buy brandy
dress
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 will pressure on their family fund, which can be a disastrous choice for them. In terms of
positive
Add an article
the positive
a positive
show examples
 side
to maintain
Change preposition
of maintaining
show examples
Use synonyms
dress
Correct article usage
the dress
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 code
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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, if
dress
Use synonyms
 decorum is maintained from
Use synonyms
school
Correct article usage
the school
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 level,
then
Linking Words
 I believe when they will do
Correct article usage
an offical
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offical
Correct your spelling
official
 job they will not face any problems
to maintain
Change the verb form
maintaining
show examples
wearing
Correct article usage
the wearing
show examples
offcial
Correct your spelling
official
dress
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, second day
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 my first job, in
rainy
Add an article
the rainy
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 season, I got wet by
rain
Correct article usage
the rain
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, and later I changed it in
office
Correct article usage
the office
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, but
on the other hand
Linking Words
,
on
Correct your spelling
one
show examples
 of my
college
Replace the word
colleagues
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 could not do
this
Linking Words
, because he did not keep
alternative
Correct article usage
an alternative
show examples
dress
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
school
Use synonyms
dress
Use synonyms
 represents not only their identity but
also
Linking Words
 keeps
botherhood
Correct your spelling
brotherhood
motherhood
 among
students
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by aamenis on

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task response
Make sure to have a clear thesis statement that directly addresses the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay with well-developed paragraphs and appropriate linking devices.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary by using more precise and varied words and phrases. Avoid repetition of words.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to avoid mistakes and improve overall clarity.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • school uniforms
  • sense of unity
  • equality
  • reduces distraction
  • peer pressure
  • easier identification
  • safety
  • professional attire
  • formal attire
  • financial burden
What to do next:
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