Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?

#parents #pressure #children #reason #development

Nowadays many parents

pressured

Wrong verb form

pressure

show examples

Change preposition

apply

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their youngth to

be succeed

Change the verb form

succeed

show examples

in different aspects of their lives and they hard-working to achieve

this

. There are several reasons for

this

trend and I believe it

world

Correct your spelling

would

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affect

negative

Change the adjective

negatively

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in young living to

develop

Replace the word

development

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and growth

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apply

show examples

. In

this

, essay will discuss the reason and the negative attitude. On the one hand, parents are obsessed with their

children

's success and they have more resources to invest in their youth. They always impact their

children

have to learn all of the skills to make them successful and they believe that it will make them better.

In addition

, they put them to art school, scram school or soft skill workshops.

Also

might help their

children

to be successful but I think that it is bragging about their kids

Correct your spelling

show examples

parents.

Moreover

, It will cause mental exhaustion, fall into depression, anxiety, extreme stress and detrimental to their health issue. The rate of adolescent mental health problems and suicide are increasing and they do not want human to avoid being scrutinized and berated.

On the other hand

Children

can learn more useful things in life, expand their knowledge and

also

they will easily pass the exam.

Alsoalso

Correct your spelling

Also also

they can successfully early and can connect to other people around the world and create more and more relationships, connected to other cultures.

For example

, they should learn more skills and spend more time

to studies

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

than playing games. It will be better than fewer studies. In conclusion, both of these discussions are both negative and positive

development

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developments

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and they have harmful

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

benefits

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for

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offspring. So I think we should invest more and more in

children

available but we can not put pressure on them.

Submitted by gipphi147 on Sun Oct 29 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and is logically connected to the preceding and following paragraphs. Use transition words and phrases to improve coherence and cohesion.

task achievement

Make sure to fully address all parts of the essay prompt, and provide specific examples to support your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Excessive pressure
Academic achievements
Professional success
Secure future
Social comparison
Competitive environment
Psychological impact
Stress and anxiety
Resilience
Work ethic
Emotional well-being
Supportive parenting
Achievements
Life skills
Balance

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Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

More and More People No Longer Read Newspapers or Watch TV Programmes to Get Their News. They Get Their News From the Internet. Is This a Positive or Negative Development?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In the past, most people lived in small villages where everyone knew everyone else. Nowadays, most people live in large cities where they only know a few people in their area. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of living in a mall community?

More and more fathers are taking break from their careers so that they can stay home and take care of their children while their wives work. This is better for the family than having both parents work full time. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.