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Band 7.5

In many countries, people can eat a wide variety of food from other countries. As a result, they eat more food from other cultures rather than cuisine. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #variety #food #cultures #cuisine #development
In many nations,
people
 tend to try different foods from other countries, and usually, they become a fan of those foods
instead
 of their local
food
. In
this
 essay, I will consider both benefits and drawbacks and give my own opinion. It is amazing that technology has influenced
food
 habits. lots of individuals all over the world are curious about the lives and traditions of others in a variety part.
People
 became aware of other nation's cultures through television, websites, and media.
For example
, when I watched a Korean Series, I was so stimulated to taste their famous cuisine, Kimchi. Other cultural dishes are very popular. It caused the
food
 industry to develop and many factories produced the ingredients of these foods,
moreover
, imports and exports increased
then
 more folks could get jobs in factories or they could open their own restaurant or stalls and earn money.
In addition
, many individuals can get benefits by attracting others to give information and learn about different cultures. Eventually, economic growth,
due to
 these activities.
However
, eating foreign dishes has some negative impacts.
Firstly
,
people
 may forget their local
food
 over the years and demand for local produce and dishes decline.
Therefore
, someone who was a specialist in cooking cuisines lost their business.
furthermore
, the old recipes would be neglected and ruined.
Finally
, part of the society has to change their jobs. In conclusion, I personally feel that the advantages of
this
 subject outweigh the disadvantages because it leads
people
 across the world to know more about each other and their traditions. But we should get a balance between promoting our cuisine and other nations.
Submitted by kmibehnaz98 on

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task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout the essay.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and expressions.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar usage.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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