IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion?

Some believe that success is the main indicator of
intelligence
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others argue that
intelligence
Use synonyms
 should be assessed through different methods.I don’t agree with both
afirmations
Correct your spelling
affirmations
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 there are some
things
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 to discuss.Sometimes a person reaches
to
Change preposition
apply
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his
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 top
intellingence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
 by passing a
lot
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 of problems and lessons,
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however
Punctuation problem
however,
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 there are
people
Use synonyms
 who are not intelligent in everything, but in certain
things
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 they are unstoppable. The first reason to support
this
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 view is that some
people
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reaches
Correct subject-verb agreement
reach
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
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theyr
Correct your spelling
their
intelligence
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 by passing
throught
Correct your spelling
through
 a
lot
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 of problems and
lesson
Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
show examples
.And
that is
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 why,when you pass
throught
Correct your spelling
through
 a
lot
Use synonyms
 of
obstacles
Punctuation problem
obstacles,
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 they remember what
was the problem
Correct word order
the problem was
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 at that time
and
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, and
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 after
that
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that,
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 they think how not
do
Verb problem
making
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 the same mistake once again.
they
Fix capitalization
They
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 think a
lot
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 because of
it
Punctuation problem
it,
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 they develop a
lot
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 of knowledge.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
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 you can reach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
you
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
intelligence
Use synonyms
 by teaching and studying a
lot
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 in school or university
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 nowadays
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this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
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 institutions
doesns
Wrong verb form
don't
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 prepare your
intelligence
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 for your future life.
For example
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,when I was young, I sold
apple
Fix capitalization
Apple
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 devices
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 without knowing how to
sell
Punctuation problem
sell,
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 I lost a
lot
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 of money
,after
Punctuation problem
. After
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brainstormin
Correct your spelling
brainstorming
 what I should do, I developed my
intelligence
Use synonyms
how
Change preposition
on how
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 to sell better. The second reason that I want to support is
there
Correct word choice
that there
show examples
 are
people
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 who are not intelligent in everything, but in certain
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things
Punctuation problem
things,
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 they are unstoppable.A
lot
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 of
people
Use synonyms
 find
theyr
Correct your spelling
their
 path by
nowere
Correct your spelling
nowhere
.You do not need to be intelligent in everything
,
Punctuation problem
;
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all you should do is
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
find your own way of
intelligence
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.
For
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example
Add a comma
example,
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 Bill Gates, even though he wasn’t the best in school or university,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
 look now,
it
Correct pronoun usage
he
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 has the most expensive company in the world.
To sum up
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,being
intellingent
Correct your spelling
intelligent
 is good,but not every time your
intelligence
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 can help you in the most difficult situations.
Beside
Change preposition
Besides
show examples
Linking Words
this
Add a comma
this,
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 you need to have in your arsenal
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
things
Use synonyms
:
Punctuation problem
:
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 team spirit, persuasiveness and so on.
This
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 is the
intellinigence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
.
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
but not the
things
Use synonyms
 you learn at school.

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task response
State a clear view in the start and restate it at the end.
task response
Plan the essay with 1 or 2 main ideas and add proof or support for each.
coherence
Use simple links to connect ideas, like but, also, so, then.
coherence
Make a small plan, with a top idea for each paragraph.
task response
Give more clear and real examples to show your point.
accuracy
Check spelling and grammar and use easy words.
content
You give some real life examples.
structure
You show two ideas on intelligence.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • measure
  • intelligence
  • success
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving
  • adaptability
  • emotional intelligence
  • creativity
  • practical skills
  • standardized testing
  • academic performance
  • capabilities
  • potential
  • privilege
  • correlate
  • hard work
What to do next:
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