IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The best way for a country to prepare for the future is to invest resources in its young people To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#country #future #resources #people
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It is said that the most effective method for a native's future is investing in young
people
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. I disagree with
this
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 opinion, and in
this
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essay
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essay,
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 I will present that opinion.
To begin
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 with, investing in young
people
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 can bring many benefits to a
country
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. It’s great that they have access to modern
knowledge
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 and facilities, and they can use their
knowledge
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 to develop the
country
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 in various fields.
In addition
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, their physical strength can be a valuable resource to the
country
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 as well.
For example
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, Road the Olympia has been investing a lot in young
people
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 so that they can access new
knowledge
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 and upgrade their
skill
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skills
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 to study abroad, and from there, they can bring back their learning to develop the
country
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.
Additionally
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, they are
also
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 highly adaptable and can quickly learn new skills and technologies. Since they have their whole lives ahead of them.
Moreover
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, young
people
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 can serve as role models for others in their community, which can help to promote positive values and
behaviors
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behaviours
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.
On the other hand
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,
while
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 investing in young
people
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 can bring numerous benefits, there can
also
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 be some drawbacks. One of the problems in today's society is that young
people
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 tend to prioritize leisure activities or salary
instead
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 of education and skill building. They only care about immediate goals without planning for the long term. Another problem could be the lack of
experience
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 and
knowledge
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 that comes with youth. They may need more guidance and support from
the
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apply
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older
people
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 who have a wealth of
experience
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 and specialized
knowledge
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.
Furthermore
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, young
people
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 may sometimes be viewed as lacking credibility or having limited authority
due to
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 their age and perceived lack of
experience
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. When looking at an old
person
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 and a young
person
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,
for instance
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,
people
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 will feel that the older
person
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 looks more professional and experienced, and of
course
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course,
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 the young
person
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 will be seen as lacking
experience
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 and understanding. In conclusion, investing in young
people
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 is important for a
country
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's growth in the long run. It’s important to strike a balance between investing in their potential
while
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also
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 being mindful of the potential drawbacks.
Submitted by thuhuyen16992qn on

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task response
Provide a clearer stance in the introduction.
coherence cohesion
Ensure consistent logical structure within paragraphs.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary.
grammatical range
Work on sentence structure to vary sentence types.
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