An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What prombles does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

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It is obvious that the
number
Use synonyms
of doctors and teachers
are play
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are playing
show examples
a vital role
for
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in
show examples
a
country
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where leaving their own poorer nations to
developed
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both
side
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sides
show examples
what
problem
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does
Unnecessary verb
apply
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this
Linking Words
couse
Correct your spelling
causes
and what can be done
deal
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to deal
show examples
.
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with.
show examples
On the one hand, Every
countries
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country
show examples
need a
number
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of
people
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who are developing a
nation
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and it is
equaly
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equally
necessary for every
department
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such
Linking Words
as education,
medical
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medicine
show examples
,
agricultureso
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agriculture
on.
Firstly
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, an increasing
number
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of professional
people
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are valueless for the same
department
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.
For example
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, In one
department
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enough for 10 to 20
scientists
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although
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where
Correct your spelling
there
show examples
have
Verb problem
are
show examples
50
scientists
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which is
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problem
Add an article
a problem
show examples
for that
department
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and
also
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it is a
problem
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for that
country
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such
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as low salary , proper respect,
Correct word choice
and job
show examples
job less
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jobs
show examples
.
Secondly
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,
Correct article usage
an Incrasing
show examples
Incrasing
Correct your spelling
Increasing
number
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of
scientists
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can not
efforts
Correct your spelling
afford
show examples
a
nation
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which is
Verb problem
that
show examples
demotivate
Wrong verb form
demotivates
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
people
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who are
doctor
Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
show examples
and
teacher
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teachers
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, It is indeed true that
doctor
Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
show examples
and
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
are
increas
Correct your spelling
increase
increasing
in
this
Linking Words
era and a
nation
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can
slove
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solve
show examples
this
Linking Words
problem
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.
Firstly
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, A poor
nation
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can provide job opportunities for
scientists
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in other countries which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not only help to
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
but
also
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reduce conflict
scientist
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in scientist
show examples
job.
Secondly
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,
Correct article usage
an inceasing
show examples
inceasing
Correct your spelling
increasing
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number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
of doctors and teacher
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
important for a poor
country
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because only education help
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
nation
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for
Change preposition
with
show examples
development.
For example
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,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
China is a
sucessful
Correct your spelling
successful
country
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only
for
Change preposition
because of
show examples
their professional
people
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who help to
growing
Change the verb form
grow
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
development and
economey
Correct your spelling
economy
.
As a result
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, increasing
Correct article usage
the scientsts
show examples
scientsts
Correct your spelling
scientists
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
all the
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
time
problem
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for a
nation
Use synonyms
.
To sum up
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, More
scientists
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are inconvenient for a
country
Use synonyms
even though a poor
nation
Use synonyms
can easily
developm
Correct your spelling
develop
for professionals.
Submitted by muhammadnaim194196 on

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task achievement
The essay does not fully address the task requirements. It lacks clear and specific examples to support the points made. Provide more relevant examples to support the ideas.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is somewhat confusing, and the introduction and conclusion need improvement. Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion with proper linking of ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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