Some people say that industrial growth is necessary to solve poverty but some other people argue that industrial growth is leading to poverty and it should be stopped. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

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It is argued that industrial development can resolve
poverty
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while
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some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
others hold
opposite
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the opposite
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point of view believing that
this
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is the cause of
problem
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the problem
show examples
and should be banned.
This
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essay will argue that despite that
factory
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create jobs and incomes for people in poor, it leads to income inequality, as the benefits may be concentrated among a few wealthy individuals or corporations which means the drawback of developing
industry
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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far more
outweight
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outweigh
outweighs
the advantages
on
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of
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the view of solving
poverty
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.
Manufactures
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Manufacturers
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hire
large
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a large
the large
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number
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numbers
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of
man
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men
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and
woman
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women
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to sustain the
industry
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’s productivity and profitability,
therefore
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the expansion of
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industry
Correct article usage
the industry
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brings more jobs and money.
This
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helps the alleviation of
poverty
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given living requirements can be earned with the payable jobs from factories.
For example
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,
the
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apply
show examples
access to food and education increased in
those area
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that area
those areas
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which have economic
boost
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boosts
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because of industrialization.
However
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,
this
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does not imply society can fully
eliminated
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be eliminated
eliminate
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from
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apply
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poverty
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because of inequal income
assignment
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assignments
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may happen
Verb problem
apply
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. Even though the high production of
industry
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can generate high profit, how much is enjoyed by the labour hood? The capitalist usually occupies a majority of the revenue but only a small portion is used as payment
of
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for
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the
factory
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workers. Under
this
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condition, salary gain from the growth of
industry
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is limited and saving properties to
leave
Correct your spelling
live
show examples
the poor
condition
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conditions
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is hard to achieve. For some
area
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areas
show examples
, the pay of
factory
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workers
not
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is not
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even able to cover their daily diet
necessary
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apply
show examples
.
As a result
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, the community cannot resolve the problem of poor
with
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by
show examples
having more
Use synonyms
factory
Fix the agreement mistake
factories
show examples
but
on the other hand
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, people are stuck at the working level without opportunities to move upward. The
poverty
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consists.
Submitted by sangelamami on

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coherence cohesion
Include a clear thesis statement in the introduction to indicate your position on the topic.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and idiomatic expressions to enhance your lexical resource.
grammatical range
Pay attention to your sentence structure and grammar to improve your grammatical range.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • industrial growth
  • poverty
  • income opportunities
  • technological advancements
  • productivity
  • income inequality
  • wealthy individuals
  • corporations
  • environmental impacts
  • impoverished communities
  • sustainable development
  • inclusive development
  • alleviation
  • measures
  • accompany
  • concerns
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