Some people believe watching TV is bad for children. Others believe it is a good thing. Compare these two views. Then state which view you agree with.

#people #tv #children #two

In the

last

few years, there has been an increasing debate about

, and its pros and cons for children. One crowd support the idea that it is disadvantageous for kids,

while

some other ones

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

believe in reverse. In

this

essay, I will discuss both views thoroughly, and

then

give my idea.

Firstly

, as psychologists declare, watching

is harmful for children under 2 years old.

This

technology, provides an excessive number of

excitements

Fix the agreement mistake

excitement

show examples

, and indeed they are appealing for a child, but

this

can result in some serious psychological disorders like attention deficit-

hyper activity

Correct your spelling

hyperactivity

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This

problem is

due to

the profound activation in brain regions, which cannot settle down naturally.

This

alteration can affect the regularity of their sleep, as these kids prone to sleep inconsistently.

In addition

this

, kids who watch long hours of

, tend to stay inside

the

Change the word

their

show examples

houses

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and detest playing in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

nature or doing outdoor activities. Despite these

down sides

Correct your spelling

downsides

show examples

, it is argued that being

upon

Change preposition

show examples

can increase children’s range of vocabulary, and these youths start talking sooner.

Furthermore

, some cartoons can be highly educational and intriguing. There are a lot of nurturing concepts which can be taught through the media. To put it in a nutshell, watching

has both positive and negative sides, and as the

down sides

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downsides

show examples

outweigh the

upside

Fix the agreement mistake

upsides

show examples

this

matter, I fiercely agree with the idea that

should be banned for

this

span of age, and by doing so, we can guarantee the calmness of our child.

Submitted by mehrasa.elahian on Fri Nov 03 2023

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Task Response

Ensure that your essay fully addresses all aspects of the given topic, including the comparison of the two views. Provide examples and relevant details to support your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Maintain a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. Use appropriate transition signals to connect your ideas and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

Expand your vocabulary by using a wider range of words and phrases. Aim to use more varied and precise vocabulary to express your ideas.

Grammatical Range

Work on improving your grammar accuracy and complexity. Pay attention to sentence structure, verb agreements, and proper use of tenses.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

254 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe watching TV is bad for children. Others believe it is a good thing. Compare these two views. Then state which view you agree with.

Fully explain your ideas

More and more people want to buy clothes, cars and other products from well-known brands. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

An increase in production of consumer goods results in damage of the natural environment. What are the causes and possible solutions?

Today, many people do not know their neighbours in large cities What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

Some people believe that university students should be required to attend classes. Others believe that going to classes should be optional for students. Which point of view do you agree with?

Many people say that globalisation and the growing number of multinational companies have a negative effect on the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.