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Band 7

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both there views and give your own opinion.

#people #work #organization #life #organizations
It is believed that a secure
career
 is a crucial event in an individual’s life.
However
, several opinions think working in the same
place
 is better than working in many areas. I lean towards working in the same office
due to
 convenience and efficiency. So in
this
 essay, I will explain my views in both modes. On the one hand, working in the same
place
 for many years has many merits,
Firstly
, a secure
career
,
in other words
, working without concern for the future and focusing and developing his experience and efficiency.
In addition
, the work environment will be convenient without obstacles in the office
due to
 the sustainability of
career
Correct article usage
the career
show examples
,
Furthermore
, the promotion in positions because knowing all policies and tasks ensures the employee more opportunities to reach the senior management level.
For example
, I have been working in the same
place
 for over 7 years each year I promote my level and salary.
On the other hand
, Changing the workplace is
also
 considered a good option others prefer it for many reasons, the most important one is multiple experiences, different sources of learning, and changing.
Thus
, it allows them to discover more ideas.
Moreover
, they will be able to make a huge social network that plays an ideal role in finding a lot of jobs and chances in
career
 life.
To sum up
, each mode of working has its own set of merits and demerits. The choice between working same
place
 or many places ultimately depends on the Individual’s preferences, circumstances, and needs.
Submitted by ahmedom3991 on

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general
Make sure to provide a clearer thesis statement in the introduction that directly addresses both viewpoints and your opinion. Additionally, focus on improving overall clarity and coherence by linking ideas more logically.
specific
Provide more detailed and specific supporting points and counterpoints to strengthen your argument. Explain how different aspects support or negate each view.
language
Try to use more varied vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the flow and comprehension of the essay. This will also help to demonstrate a more advanced level of language proficiency.
structure
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, which clearly frame the argument.
examples
Relevant specific examples, like the author's personal experience, are provided to support the argument.
content
The essay touches on multiple aspects of the topic, showing both benefits and drawbacks of each viewpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • stability
  • loyalty
  • seniority
  • job satisfaction
  • rapidly changing job market
  • adapt to
  • work culture
  • career progression
  • network
  • diversity of experience
  • adaptability
  • career aspirations
  • dynamic nature
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