IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think the government should establish free libraries in each town. Others believe that it is a waste of money since people can access the Internet to obtain information. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #government #libraries #town #waste #money #access #internet #information
People
 have different views regarding whether the government ought to construct some
libraries
 for the public to utilize.
While
 some
people
 argue that it is
such
 a waste of expenditure as most
people
search
 the
information
 online, I agree with the idea that
libraries
 can contribute to positive influence. On the one hand, there are a lot of electric books and
information
 that we can take advantage of the
internet
 to find the
information
 which we look for. Compared to the past, fewer and fewer
people
 would go to
libraries
.
For example
, we can
search
 for most
information
 through Google and other
search
 engines;
moreover
, with the upgrade of ChatGPT, many
people
 turn to the
internet
 for
information
. Those new technologies
also
 give rise to the phenomenon that more and more
people
 would choose to buy them to replace physical books in
libraries
.
Therefore
, some
people
 argue that the government should stop allocating expenditure on
such
 construction.
On the other hand
, I think free
libraries
 are still essential for the public despite the fact that the
internet
 indeed leads us to easily access
information
.
To begin
 with,
libraries
 provide a harmonious space for the public to be highly concentrated on their personal business.
For instance
, most of the public would choose to cram studies in
libraries
 since they can deeply focus on their tasks in a quiet atmosphere.
In addition
,
libraries
 offer everyone an opportunity to get access to knowledge.
In other words
, some of the poor
as well as
 the
people
 who cannot
search
 online conveniently, can overcome
this
 barrier and keep absorbing plenty of knowledge in distinct fields through the resources in
libraries
.
As a result
, it can address the illiterate problems in the society. In conclusion,
although
people
 utilize the
internet
 and can freely take advantage of it to seek knowledge, I still believe that
libraries
 are indispensable constructions and are able to provide a suitable place for doing personal tasks.
Submitted by sherry0588 on

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task response
Make sure to fully address the prompt and provide a clear opinion about whether the government should establish free libraries or not.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize your main points.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to add variety and precision to your writing.
grammatical range
Work on improving the accuracy and complexity of your sentence structures.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public libraries
  • community centers
  • educational programs
  • democratize access
  • socio-economic status
  • resources
  • reliable internet access
  • digital infrastructure
  • forward-thinking
  • technological advancements
  • digital literacy
  • online educational resources
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