IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Some people think the newly built houses should be the same as the old houses in local areas. Others argue that local authorities should allow people to build houses in their own style. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #houses #areas #authorities #style
The graphs show information about recorded crime trends across EU member states (2007-2010) –
Y
Correct article usage
The y
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 axis shows
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
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 change and gender of offenders for different crimes (Sept 2011 – 2012). We should describe and discuss. It should be mentioned in the first paragraph that it illustrates a lot of lines between 2007 and 2010 years. We have domestic burglary, drug trafficking, violent crime, robbery and motor vehicle theft lines. In 2007 domestic burglary was 100 and
then
 in 2010
this
 number went up to 107
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
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. In 2007 drug trafficking was 100 and
this
 number did not change until 2009. After 2009 the line went down to 97
percentage
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per cent
show examples
. Between 2007
to
Correct word choice
and
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 2010 the red line fell to 77percatge. The blue line in 2007 was 100 and decreased to 95 by 2010. The second graph shows information about
gender
Add an article
the gender
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 of offenders for different crimes between 2011 to 2012. The sexual offences had 98
percentages
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per cent
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 in males and 2
percentages
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per cent
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 in females.
The fraud
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Fraud
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 and forgery had 72
percentages
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per cent
show examples
 in
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
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 and 28
percentages
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per cent
show examples
. The criminal damage in
female
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females
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 is higher by 88
percentages
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per cent
show examples
 (12). The robbery
male
Correct your spelling
rate
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 is
in
Change preposition
apply
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10 times higher. Motoring offences in girls
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 higher by 92
percentages
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per cent
show examples
. The other male is
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
9 times higher. The theft and handling
stolen
Change preposition
of stolen
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 goods had 79
percentages
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per cent
show examples
 in
man
Fix the agreement mistake
men
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 and 21
percentages
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per cent
show examples
 in a woman. Violence against the person man had
higher
Add an article
a higher
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 position than women by 80
percentages
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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