IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You have lost an item of value on a train. Write a letter to the railway company. In your letter •describe the item • explain where and when you left it • say what action you would like the company to take Write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to inform you that I
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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lost my item on the Bogor train line on 2nd November. I had brought my
handbag
Use synonyms
 with white running shoes and
small
Correct article usage
a small
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 towel inside it when I took the train
this
Linking Words
 morning. The
handbag
Use synonyms
 is blue with a whitelist and
“NIKE”
Correct article usage
a “NIKE”
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 word on it. I departed from Jakarta Kota station at 7.30
am
Correct your spelling
a.m
. I was in the first carriage, only for
woman
Fix the agreement mistake
women
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, and put my
handbag
Use synonyms
 in the luggage rack.
Then
Linking Words
, I dropped off at Tanjung Barat station and forgot to bring back my
handbag
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I would be grateful if your team would find and keep it for me. If my item has been placed in safekeeping, please inform me where I can retrieve the bag by sending the message to 07654321. Thank you for
your
Change the word
the
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 time to consider my report. I am looking forward to hearing from you. Best Regards, Aliya Fahira

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lexico-grammatical
"The handbag is blue with a whitelist and 'NIKE' word on it." Instead of 'whitelist', use 'white list'.
task achievement
Consider including more specific details about the item and its contents.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure coherence between the last paragraph and the rest of the letter.
grammatical range
Review sentence structure and grammar throughout the letter.
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