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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014.

The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014.
#change #prices #three #metals
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The line graph provides information about the modifications of copper, nickel and zinc during every month in 2014.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen a significant downward trend which spreads on Nickel.
Also
Linking Words
, it’s noticeable that copper had a general slight decline in
price
Use synonyms
 changes during the period of time.
However
Linking Words
, zinc showed an upward trend in modifications of cost. Nickel had a dramatic increase from January to
June
Use synonyms
 (from 6 to -3 per
cent
Use synonyms
). After, the data showed a slight rise till the period of time when the
price
Use synonyms
 remained stable (from
June
Use synonyms
 to September). The
price
Use synonyms
 fell slightly to -1 per
cent
Use synonyms
 from September to October.
At the end
Linking Words
 of 2014, it could be seen that the
price
Use synonyms
 went up considerably from October to December (from -2 to 1 per
cent
Use synonyms
). Copper grew gradually from the beginning of the year till May (from 2 to -0.5 per
cent
Use synonyms
). After that, it climbed gradually to 1 per
cent
Use synonyms
 in
June
Use synonyms
 and remained constant till September. There was a slight jump till the end of the year (from 1 to 0,5 per
cent
Use synonyms
). On another hand, zinc showed an increase from
June
Use synonyms
 to February (the
price
Use synonyms
 went up by 2 per
cent
Use synonyms
).
Also
Linking Words
, the metal showed a
sharply
Change the adverb
sharp
show examples
 drop of 4 per
cent
Use synonyms
 from February to
June
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the data remained stable from
June
Use synonyms
 to October. After, the metal provided a significant soar till the end of 2014 (from -1 to 2 per
cent
Use synonyms
).
Submitted by fedorusa2016 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words price, june, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "provides" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 4 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average monthly change
  • prices of metals
  • trend
  • spike
  • fluctuation
  • increase
  • decrease
  • sharp rise
  • sharp fall
  • stability
  • volatility
  • data points
  • comparison
  • contrast
  • external factors
  • influences
  • market dynamics
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