Young people are often influenced by their peers. This is called peer group pressure. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Indubitably,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
young individuals are highly influenced by their peers.
This
peer pressure not only
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
myriad benefits but several bad consequences
also
.
However
, I will elucidate my opinions in the
upsurging
Correct word choice
upcoming
show examples
paragraphs.
Nevertheless
, having a good friend circle not only provides joy to a young
one
but
also
keep
Correct subject-verb agreement
keeps
show examples
one
motivated as
a
Change the article
an
show examples
alone person cannot cope
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with different challenges himself /herself.
One
must have a peer group in order to keep oneself active that
further
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
him/her in handling the problems or different situations.
for
instance
Add a comma
instance,
show examples
A boy from Surrey, Canada was forced by his friends to
give
Verb problem
apply
show examples
audition in a singing contest,he not only
one
that competition but
also
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
a famous singer
also
known as Drake.
Furthermore
, not every individual in
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
good peers
as a consequence
of which
one
has to face a number of problems in his/her life.To vindicate-
according to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an article published in a national daily
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
reports that a boy nearly
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sixteen years
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
was the
proper
Change the adjective
properly
show examples
disciplined boy
according to
the school and the parents but
Ilas
Correct your spelling
as
he got promoted to
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
class, his peer group changed
as a result
his habits got completely changed. After watching
this
his parents asked about the reasons he ignored them.
Then
after
Change preposition
apply
show examples
two or three weeks later police came to their house to arrest him in case of theft and murder during the interrogation he admitted that he had
done
Verb problem
made
show examples
this
mistake
coming
Verb problem
apply
show examples
under the pressure of his friends,who got bailed as all the theft money was recovered from his room and even the murder was done by him. Now, he is imprisoned for twelve years.
To conclude
,
one
must have friends in his/her life but he/she must choose them wisely as it
further
decide
Change the verb form
decides
show examples
their future
either
Correct word choice
whether
show examples
it will be troublesome or a prosperous
one
.
Submitted by naresh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting details. Aim for a more organized and structured essay.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. This will enhance the overall credibility of your essay.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary to include a wider range of words and expressions. This will make your essay more engaging and sophisticated.
grammatical range
Work on your grammar accuracy and sentence structures. Ensure proper use of tenses, subject-verb agreement, and sentence formation.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: