Whether or not a person achieves their aims in life is mostly related to luck. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Most
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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people
believe that
,
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apply
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a
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apply
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someone
complete
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completes
show examples
their targets in their lifetime most probably on their luck. I completely disagree with
this
statement and
this
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in this
show examples
essay
i
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I
show examples
will argue with
this
statement considering
the
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that
show examples
people
work hard to achieve their
target
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targets
show examples
and some
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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behavior changers to
fullfill
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fulfil
their
require
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required
show examples
achievements. On the one hand, if
people
need to reach some achievement, they work hard to reach the final destination. Hard
working
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work
show examples
is the best option to complete whether personal or career
life
targets. In
this
regard they change their
freely
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free
show examples
life style
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lifestyle
show examples
and, every moment they are
in
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at
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the target and
also
manage their time to reach
to
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apply
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the point. As an example, Kumar Sangakkara who was
the
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a
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former cricketer in Sri Lanka
,
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apply
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had played 300 balls
evryday
Correct your spelling
every day
himself using the balling machine to practice for the
oneday
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one-day
one day
cricket matches.
On the other hand
,
people
have some
of
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the
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apply
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behaviors
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behaviours
show examples
in their
life
and they have to change that
kind
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kinds
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of
things
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thing
show examples
to reach their goals.
Furthermore
, some
people
likes
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like
show examples
to sleep
at
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in
show examples
the
day time
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daytime
show examples
and
also
spend freely in their
life
.
Nevertheless
, the target has
came
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come
show examples
in
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to
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their mind
the
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that
show examples
life
completely
change
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changed
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another way and after
that
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that,
show examples
they have to regret the free
life styles
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lifestyles
show examples
and the
behaviors
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behaviours
show examples
which are followed before. As an example, someone
have
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has
show examples
to face an exam their sleeping timetable has changed and some of the days end without sleeping. In conclusion,
the
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apply
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luck is the method of
the
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apply
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failure
people
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in people
show examples
who
are believe
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believe
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.
Hence
, I disagree with the statement and I believe that
,
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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hard
working
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work
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and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
changes are the best methods to reach their goals.
Submitted by prabhashamila on

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coherence cohesion
Although you have provided an introduction and a conclusion, they could be more developed. Try to give a clear overview of your main points in your introduction and summarize your arguments in the conclusion.
task achievement
Make sure to support your main points with specific examples. This will make your arguments more convincing and strengthen your essay.
lexical resource
You need to work on expanding your range of vocabulary. Attempt to use a variety of words and phrases to express your ideas in a more nuanced manner.
grammatical range
There are several grammatical errors in your essay. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and sentence structure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • luck
  • determination
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • skills
  • continuous learning
  • achievements
  • opportunities
  • networking
  • personal accountability
  • diverse backgrounds
  • access to resources
  • causality
  • creative industries
  • structured fields
  • linear
  • predicated on merit
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