You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: In many countries, the tradition of families living together is disappearing. What are the reasons for this trend? What are the effects on the family and society as a whole? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #countries #tradition #families #trend #effects #society

Undoubtedly, in the contemporary era, there are more and more cases when families

want

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do want

show examples

not to live under the same roof. Many argue that it

only

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is only

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a modern tendency of freedom, but others claim that the reason for

this

belong

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belongs

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to advances in technology and

global

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the global

show examples

rise of income.

This

essay will

be outlined

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outline

show examples

these trends and some consequences which have been caused in today's society. There is no shadow of a doubt that

Remove the comma

apply

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the growth of the global economy

have

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has

show examples

been bringing many benefits day by day. Naturally, people become more

wealtthy

Correct your spelling

wealthy

as well as

some of them become really affluent.

Consequently

, they want more freedom and independence because of the opportunities which money can bring.

As a result

, many of them begin to buy

Correct article usage

apply

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new

appartments

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apartment

apartments

, houses or even mansions.

Moreover

, new kinds of businesses have been started. To exemplify, one

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show examples

my neighbours

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

built a hotel near the Baltic

sea

Capitalize word

Sea

show examples

approximatelly

Correct your spelling

approximately

two years ago , where he

live

Wrong verb form

lived

show examples

with his family near the Baltic

sea

Capitalize word

Sea

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approximatelly

Correct your spelling

approximately

and now he is very rich. From my perspective, it gives only positive

outcome

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outcomes

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. New young families, which have started new businesses, are producing something new now. It is sensible

to conclude

that it generates more money,

work places

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workplaces

show examples

and

also

more taxes to the government. In a global

sence

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sense

, if individuals will have more funds, the whole nation will have too. Literally, more individual freedom

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also has

show examples

also

has

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

show examples

own merits. It appears that more creativity can be brought and some new ideas would born. In conclusion, as it can be seen only positive

outcomes

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outcome

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that

familiy

Correct your spelling

family

families

do not live together.

However

, it does not mean that living together is a harmful thing. Nowadays, every family can

take

Correct your spelling

make

show examples

their own decision

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

settles

Correct subject-verb agreement

settle

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where

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

it's

Correct your spelling

its

show examples

own priorities in

independency

Replace the word

independence

show examples

or strong family bonds.

Submitted by roker123456 on Sun Nov 05 2023

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Task Achievement

Ensure that your introduction clearly introduces the topic and provides a brief overview of the main points you will be discussing in the essay. Additionally, don't forget to summarize your main points in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on improving the coherence and cohesion of your essay. Use clear topic sentences and transitions to guide the reader through your ideas. Make sure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and provides sufficient support.

Lexical Resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to make your essay more varied and sophisticated. Try to use more precise and specific words and phrases to convey your ideas.

Grammatical Range

Pay attention to your grammar to avoid errors and improve the overall clarity of your writing. Review basic grammar rules and use a variety of sentence structures.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

306 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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