Nowadays, a lot of people are able to do their work from home. Discuss both the advantage and disadvantages of this development.

#people #work #home #advantage #development

In recent years, in the technological progress era, the utilisation of automobiles has significantly increased.

Due to

the fact that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

number of

car

vehicles has exceeded the number of people. In

this

essay, I will highlight the pros and cons of both arguments and share my viewpoint . On the one hand, using a private

car

makes life easier for personages in many ways. First of all, by having their own

car

, humans do not have to use infrequent and overcrowded public transportation.

This

means they reach their workplace on time and without experiencing any hardship.

Secondly

, Having their own

car

, families can travel more frequently and more conveniently.

That is

as a result

this

trend children can have more fun, and family relationships can be more strong .

On the other hand

, producing more cars has a damaging effect on the environment.

Consequently

, the more

car

is produced by countries, the more carbon dioxide will be released into the atmosphere.

This

means that mortals around the world may face problematic diseases.

Although

using cars is more convenient, the devastating effects of using more cars are more than the benefits.

For instance

, endangers people's lives through traffic accidents.

To conclude

, despite some drawbacks for nature

such

as air pollution, there are more positive impacts on individuals

such

as privacy and easiness of using private vehicles.

Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on Mon Nov 06 2023

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task response

The essay does not fully respond to the prompt. It does not clearly discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of people working from home. You should include a balanced analysis of both perspectives.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks coherence and cohesion. The ideas are not well-organized, and the logical structure is weak. Try to present a clear introduction that introduces the main points to be discussed, provide supporting arguments in the body paragraphs, and end with a conclusion that summarizes the main ideas.

lexical resource

There is limited use of vocabulary and the language used is quite informal. Aim to use a wider range of vocabulary and employ more formal language to convey your ideas effectively.

grammatical range

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and sentence structure problems. Make sure to review your grammar and sentence construction to improve clarity and coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

226 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

telecommuting
remote work
flexibility
work-life balance
cost savings
commute time
stress
productivity
focus
face-to-face interaction
social isolation
work-life separation
distractions
discipline
dependence
technology

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Nowadays, a lot of people are able to do their work from home. Discuss both the advantage and disadvantages of this development.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, very few young people read newspapers or follow the news on TV. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays there is an increase in social problems involving young people because more parents spent time at work than with their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that a person improves their intellectual skills more when doing group activities. To what extent do you agree? Use specific details and examples to explain your view.

Private car ownership has grown dramatically in recent years. This has led to a rise in traffic congestion. What could governments and individuals do to reduce congestion?