An increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. Why is this the case, and what solutions are possible?

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In today's society, overpopulation has led to a considerable rise in the
production
of final
goods
, resulting in the degradation of the natural
environment
. In
this
essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will name some factors contributing to
this
problem and suggest several feasible solutions. The
production
of consumer items has detrimental impacts on the
environment
because of two main reasons.
Firstly
,
besides
goods
,
this
process
also
produces an enormous amount of hazardous wastes that are in charge of pollution.
For example
, industrial emissions like nitrogen oxide or carbon dioxide not only directly pollute the air, water and soil but
also
are the main culprit of the irreversible greenhouse effect.
Secondly
,
while
proper disposing of industrial
waste
can help limit the toxic components released into the
environment
, many corporations neglect
this
process in order to allocate money for other profitable purposes.
This
is because
waste
management and disposal is an expensive and complicated procedure, requiring highly qualified staff and multiple machines.
On the other hand
, both government and corporations can take some measures to mitigate the current situation.
To begin
with, the government should promulgate strict regulations to control the amount of contaminated substances
as well as
the disposal procedure of
waste
at every factory. If corporations or factories violate the
waste
treatment, they should be strictly punished by administrative fines or even imprisonment, depending on the severity of poisonous substances released externally.
In addition
, businesses should ramp up their focus on disposing and recycling garbage in order to protect the
environment
in the first place and, at the same time, attract more consumers by cultivating positive brand recognition. In order to do that, they should mobilize their resources to develop and adopt effective techniques of
waste
recycling and treatment. In conclusion,
although
the
production
growth of consumer
goods
has discharged tons of trash and toxic components into the
environment
, there are several practical solutions for both the government and companies to alleviate the problem.An increase in the
production
of consumer
goods
results in damage to the natural
environment
. Why is
this
the case, and what solutions are possible?
Submitted by phanhuyhoang278 on

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task response
The essay demonstrates a good level of task response, with the writer addressing the causes and solutions of the issue. However, the introduction could be more focused and the conclusion should be more conclusive.
coherence cohesion
The essay shows a generally clear and logical structure, with a clear progression of ideas. However, some transitions between paragraphs and ideas could be smoother to enhance coherence.
lexical resource
The essay shows a sufficient range of vocabulary, but there is room for improvement. Try to incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary to enhance the overall quality of the essay.
grammatical range
The essay demonstrates a good control of grammar, with only a few errors. However, there are still some instances of sentence structure, verb agreement, and preposition errors. Review these aspects to further improve grammatical range.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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