IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

You recently encountered some problems with a public transportation service in your area. Write a letter to the manager of the public transport company and say - where and what the problems were - explain how these problems affect the public - suggest what changes could be made to improve the situation

#transportation #service #area #manager #transport #company #changes #situation
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Dear Sir/Madam I am writing
this
 letter to inform you about the issues regarding the local transport. At the moment, I am
pursing
Correct your spelling
pursuing
show examples
 my studies in Manchester .Nowadays,trains
got
Wrong verb form
get
show examples
 late from their usual time,
as a result
, they cannot
reached
Change the verb form
reach
show examples
their destination on time .
Due to
this
 issue, individuals from various
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
 got late
due to
this
 event .
Additionally
, I
also
 heard that some masses
also
 lost their job ,
in contrast
, some students
also
 get expelled from their university. Even many of them complained regarding
Add an article
the
show examples
issue but
unfortunately
Add a comma
unfortunately,
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 no one resolved our problem.
This
 is extremely comfortable. I suggest you
to
Remove the particle
apply
show examples
give strict instructions to staff for being punctual and
also
advice
Replace the word
advise
show examples
 them to respond
masses
Change preposition
to masses
show examples
concern
Fix the agreement mistake
concerns
show examples
. I hope you will address
this
 concern as soon as possible. Yours faithfully, Saqib Don
Submitted by notkhan01 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.
coherence cohesion
Consider including specific examples or evidence to support your claims.
coherence cohesion
Use a more formal and professional greeting and closing.
coherence cohesion
Provide more details and explanations to develop your ideas effectively.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and avoid repetition.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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